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Post Your Best Possible Tech Insult ..

Tech_Dreamer
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I've got a good suggestion for an insult: sticking dongles into the 'female end' of a USB port

Current Rig:   CPU: AMD 1950X @4Ghz. Cooler: Enermax Liqtech TR4 360. Motherboard:Asus Zenith Extreme. RAM: 8GB Crucial DDR4 3666. GPU: Reference GTX 970  SSD: 250GB Samsung 970 EVO.  HDD: Seagate Barracuda 7200.14 2TB. Case: Phanteks Enthoo Pro. PSU: Corsair RM1000X. OS: Windows 10 Pro UEFI mode  (installed on SSD)

Peripherals:  Display: Acer XB272 1080p 240Hz G Sync Keyboard: Corsair K95 RGB Brown Mouse: Logitech G502 RGB Headhet: Roccat XTD 5.1 analogue

Daily Devices:Sony Xperia XZ1 Compact and 128GB iPad Pro

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"You are about as reliable as Asus RMA"

muh specs 

Gaming and HTPC (reparations)- ASUS 1080, MSI X99A SLI Plus, 5820k- 4.5GHz @ 1.25v, asetek based 360mm AIO, RM 1000x, 16GB memory, 750D with front USB 2.0 replaced with 3.0  ports, 2 250GB 850 EVOs in Raid 0 (why not, only has games on it), some hard drives

Screens- Acer preditor XB241H (1080p, 144Hz Gsync), LG 1080p ultrawide, (all mounted) directly wired to TV in other room

Stuff- k70 with reds, steel series rival, g13, full desk covering mouse mat

All parts black

Workstation(desk)- 3770k, 970 reference, 16GB of some crucial memory, a motherboard of some kind I don't remember, Micomsoft SC-512N1-L/DVI, CM Storm Trooper (It's got a handle, can you handle that?), 240mm Asetek based AIO, Crucial M550 256GB (upgrade soon), some hard drives, disc drives, and hot swap bays

Screens- 3  ASUS VN248H-P IPS 1080p screens mounted on a stand, some old tv on the wall above it. 

Stuff- Epicgear defiant (solderless swappable switches), g600, moutned mic and other stuff. 

Laptop docking area- 2 1440p korean monitors mounted, one AHVA matte, one samsung PLS gloss (very annoying, yes). Trashy Razer blackwidow chroma...I mean like the J key doesn't click anymore. I got a model M i use on it to, but its time for a new keyboard. Some edgy Utechsmart mouse similar to g600. Hooked to laptop dock for both of my dell precision laptops. (not only docking area)

Shelf- i7-2600 non-k (has vt-d), 380t, some ASUS sandy itx board, intel quad nic. Currently hosts shared files, setting up as pfsense box in VM. Also acts as spare gaming PC with a 580 or whatever someone brings. Hooked into laptop dock area via usb switch

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You're as slow as my iPhone 4 on iOS 7!

"We live in a society exquisitely dependent on science and technology, in which hardly anyone knows anything about science and technology." ~Carl Sagan


OnePlus One, 64GB Black, Rooted, Oxygen OS 1.0.0
Moto 360, Silver Finish with 22mm Cognac Leather Band, Pascual watchface
iPad with Retina Display (3rd Generation), 16GB, Black, Wifi Only

CPU: Intel i5-4690K CPU Cooler: Stock Motherboard: Gigabyte GA-Z97N WIFI Mini ITX RAM: Kingston Savage 8GB 1866MHz SSD: Sandisk Ultra Plus 256GB HDD: WD Caviar Blue 1TB 7200RPM Case: Fractal Design Node 304, Black GPU: Intel HD Graphics 4600 PSU: Corsair RM450 OS:
Windows 7 Ultimate Windows 8.1 Pro for Students Monitor: Acer K242HL Bhid 1080p 24" Monitor Keyboard: Corsair Vengeance K70 Cherry MX Blue Mouse: Logitech T650
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Comcast comes up with a better customer service (restaurant joke)

 

 

 

@LinusTech & @Slick  i know you guys got some up your sleeve for this thread reply...Please leave a post if possible..

Details separate people.

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You must be an extreme competitive gamer (to a console user)

 

If I wanted to hear loud whining, I'd surround myself with Deltas.

deltas as in airplanes? :huh:

Details separate people.

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"Your hearing is so shit, you must be using onboard sound."

CPU: i7 2600 @ 4.2GHz  COOLING: NZXT Kraken X31 RAM: 4x2GB Corsair XMS3 @ 1600MHz MOBO: Gigabyte Z68-UD3-XP GPU: XFX R9 280X Double Dissipation SSD #1: 120GB OCZ Vertex 2  SSD #2: 240GB Corsair Force 3 HDD #1: 1TB Seagate Barracuda 7200RPM PSU: Silverstone Strider Plus 600W CASE: NZXT H230
CPU: Intel Core 2 Quad Q9550 @ 2.83GHz COOLING: Cooler Master Eclipse RAM: 4x1GB Corsair XMS2 @ 800MHz MOBO: XFX nForce 780i 3-Way SLi GPU: 2x ASUS GTX 560 DirectCU in SLi HDD #1: 1TB Seagate Barracuda 7200RPM PSU: TBA CASE: Antec 300
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You must be an extreme competitive gamer (to a console user)

 

deltas as in airplanes? :huh:

 

Delta fans  :P They move a lot of air, but are so loud... 

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There are always youtube videos to watch

https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=UUGhUtOAn4wMGmMZ7GC3_XSQ

My NYAN cat youtube mod lel

afc23ac446.jpg

I am good at computer

Spoiler

Motherboard: Gigabyte G1 sniper 3 | CPU: Intel 3770k @5.1Ghz | RAM: 32Gb G.Skill Ripjaws X @1600Mhz | Graphics card: EVGA 980 Ti SC | HDD: Seagate barracuda 3298534883327.74B + Samsung OEM 5400rpm drive + Seatgate barracude 2TB | PSU: Cougar CMX 1200w | CPU cooler: Custom loop

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Watch_Dogs runs faster on my PC than you run in real life

PCs

Spoiler
Spoiler

Branwen (2015 build) - CPU: i7 4790K GPU:EVGA GTX 1070 SC PSU: XFX XTR 650W RAM: 16GB Kingston HyperX fury Motherboard: MSI Z87 MPower MAX AC SSD: Crucial MX100 256GB + Crucial MX300 1TB  Case: Silverstone RV05 Cooler: Corsair H80i V2 Displays: AOC AGON AG241QG & BenQ BL2420PT Build log: link 

Spoiler

Netrunner (2020 build) - CPU: AMD R7 3700X GPU: EVGA GTX 1070 (from 2015 build) PSU: Corsair SF600 platinum RAM: 32GB Crucial Ballistix RGB 3600Mhz cl16 Motherboard: Gigabyte Aorus X570i pro wifi SSD: Sabrent Rocket 4.0 1TB Case: Lian Li TU150W black Cooler: Be Quiet! Dark Rock Slim

 

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You're like the iPhone 6. All it takes to break you is one finger.

Eric S. Raymond used an E6600 from 2005 until 12/30/14 or open source software creation. Raw data computations in excess of 18GB each. Core 2 Duos still have tons of life left, my friend.

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You're so tiny I could fit you in a Bitfenix Prodigy

Saying someone is tiny is not an insult because...

© a 5'4" Soup

 

Good things come in small packages.

 Two motoes to live by   "Sometimes there are no shortcuts"

                                           "This too shall pass"

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You move as fast as the default DPI that's set on my '95 computer ball-mouse.

So many things I could write here... things like this.

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