i suck at driving

[Tocsin_786]

        so today i was with my uncle and other family driving home from the cemetery (im a noob driver who drives a couple times a month till i get my own car in june/july), and when exiting i stopped at the stop sign, looked left to see if a car is coming, saw that the car was close but far away enough that i can actually drive up. and so i did and my uncle started to say that i was in the wrong and should have waited. after that first "mistake" i started panicking and making stressful decisions. i needed to get into the right lane and didnt see my blind spot, then turned left into the mall and took off instead of waiting on a intersection. after going to Home Depot and clearing my thoughts and calming down i was ready to get back into my groove (i drive bad when there are other people in the car because they judge my decisions all the time) so when trying to get into the traffic lanes exiting the mall from the "right turn lane" i went into the other lane "quickly" my uncle said how i should have gone a bit longer on the "right turn lane" but i was worried that if i stayed there i wouldnt be able to get into the normal traffic lanes because someone would be turning into the "right turn lane" then i couldnt get into the ";left turn lane" quick enough and gave up, pulled over and gave my uncle the wheel. do i suck at driving? there were two instances where i would have been in a car crash. but when i get to drive alone (going on a drive to take a placement test for college, or picking up T-shirts for my uncles business). i drive very well and safely. i get to where i need to go. but when someone starts blabbering and saying "WATCH OUT, or turn here. nooo not there, hereeeeee. i get very tense and making wrong decisions. 

[Speedyv]

My head hurts trying to imagine this...

[TheKDub]

Erm, I think you just need to control your anxiety a little better in those situations.

 

Though honestly I'm kinda like that too (It sucks ass...)

I kinda just make sure my parents know not to tell me off for stuff while I'm driving otherwise my driving just goes to shit.

[EpicGeekonFire]

My head hurts trying to imagine this...

 

Yeah seriously, its burning out my internal GPU. 

 

OP it seems you are under a lot of pressure. More practice could always help. After all, practice makes perfect. 

[monaka25]

 Your not a bad driver, practice makes perfect. Meme: Keep calm and drive.

[Speaker1264]

Best thing is to ignore it and continue driving like nothing happened.  Then, much much later you can reflect on how you could have done it better.  That way you don't stress yourself out while driving and start making more mistakes.

[Sam Z Man]

If you don't like people talking to you while you drive tell them.

[MatthewEnderle]

You should see me drive my truck. I could be considered wreck-less driving. But you seen like you're just nervous because you have someone with you. I was that way with my parents at first. Now a few weeks ago I had to go to the bank with my mother and I did 0-60 in about 6 seconds from every stop sign. I've seen a lot worse drivers here in Nebraska than my internal GPU renders your situation.

[ionbasa]

Yup. The best therapy for people who tell you how to drive is to talk back and critique their driving  .

 

In all seriousness, it will just take time not become anxious while driving with others. 

 

Just this week, I rode along with two different friends. Once tuesday night for a baseball game, and luckily we didn't die on the way back home, she's an aggressive driver (fishtailing an SUV from making a hard left is kind of scarry). And once yesterday for my friend's early birthday party at a BBQ place. He's a fast driver, not overly aggressive, but the kind of guy who makes a 3+ lane change on the freeway at 85+ mph.

 

Since I was a passenger in both cases, I knew to keep my mouth shut; unless I'm poking fun at them, letting them know a lane is clear, or letting them know highway patrol is near.

 

As for my own driving, I don't get anxious driving others. It just takes practice and experience to get in the groove and feel of driving with others.

 

If anything, being anxious while driving shows yourself that you don't quite know everything yet. 

 

By any chance do you listen to the radio while driving? If not, I would recommend you do, it can be quite therapeutic while under stress.

[JAKEBAB]

I just thought of the best idea for a TV show lol.

 

Edit: Also you didn't do this so i think your pretty fine.

 

[Guest trucker2]

Should have seen me my first year with a cdl in an 18 wheeler. If there is no street sign I was probably there:)

[as96]

I don't know how it works over there but, what are you going to do at the driving test? At least here they tell you where to go, and usually at the last moment, to test your reaction/attention.

[Tocsin_786]

Yup. The best therapy for people who tell you how to drive is to talk back and critique their driving [emoji14].

In all seriousness, it will just take time not become anxious while driving with others.

Just this week, I rode along with two different friends. Once tuesday night for a baseball game, and luckily we didn't die on the way back home, she's an aggressive driver (fishtailing an SUV from making a hard left is kind of scarry). And once yesterday for my friend's early birthday party at a BBQ place. He's a fast driver, not overly aggressive, but the kind of guy who makes a 3+ lane change on the freeway at 85+ mph.

Since I was a passenger in both cases, I knew to keep my mouth shut; unless I'm poking fun at them, letting them know a lane is clear, or letting them know highway patrol is near.

As for my own driving, I don't get anxious driving others. It just takes practice and experience to get in the groove and feel of driving with others.

If anything, being anxious while driving shows yourself that you don't quite know everything yet.

By any chance do you listen to the radio while driving? If not, I would recommend you do, it can be quite therapeutic while under stress.

I do listen to the radio or music when i drive alone. I also sing and dance along to it.

[Trik'Stari]

I'd have told him to shutup, as he wasn't driving and was doing little more than distracting the driver. Maybe crank the radio up

[AlwaysFSX]

Yeah I'd have just yelled for him to shut the hell up. I have no patience for people bitching at me for no reason especially if I'm driving.

[Calavera]

You never will be the worst driver out there, never.

Shit like this happens, don't worry about it

[techswede]

I'd suggest going for more drives with him. This is something that needs to be trained out of you. 

[Thorium19]

I would take his advice, as he's probably a far more experienced driver than you and has likely seen incidents occur that involved manouvres similar to what you were doing. It's distracting yes and can be annoying, but he is only trying to make sure you don't make the mistakes that others do.

Also, I wouldn't go about saying you're a good driver on your own, because unless you're a pessimist you're going to think you're a good driver even if you do make these mistake on your own.

Go for more drives with different passengers, it's a good way to learn how to stop panicking, as well as potentially picking up some tips on roadcraft.

[GoldSrc]

Dude, I suck so bad at driving that I don't know how to do it lol.

Your story sure makes my head hurt though.

Now imagine the pressure the Apollo astronauts were under, when they first tried they first dock with the lunar module.

[Gikero]

I can drive a car fine till I am driving with my dad in the vehicle. He drove truck for the first 10 years of my life and is generally overly critical. It makes me tense. Just keep working at it and you'll get the hang of it.

[ind3x]

-snip-

I guess you're pretty new at driving...

In your situation i would tell your co-driver to shut up till the situation's over. after you've changed lane/whatever he can tell you how he would've done it.

I live in Denmark, and it's pretty hard to get a driver's license here, so when i got mine i was pretty confident driving. But i know the feel of backseat driving. It can really be stressful in tight situations when you're already pretty filled up just by driving. 

 

Just note that whoever speaks to you is usually a more experienced driver, and probably knows what's best. And because he's not driving, he isn't stressed, and might not think about what's going on in your head.

 

But hey man, you just need to drive more, and take your time while doing so. It's better to go a little slow and be confident, than rushing things.

If you choose to drive a tad slower, just be prepared for people to sometimes be a bit short fused, trying to move on. Just make sure to give these people space to move on (merge lanes/whatever)

 

Have a good one

[Bogica]

The key is to relax. Imagine this scenario, I'm driving my mom, dad and brother to another town 40km over. Now, my brother, being 3 years older than me likes to drive aggressively and keeps telling me to speed up (I was already at 100km/h... 60mp/h), my dad keeps telling me to switch lanes sooner and my mom keeps yelling that I should slow down... Let's just say my stress levels were thru the roof. So 5 km into the ride I lost my shit and yelled SHUT UP! Everything went silent, turned up the radio and drove 35km with everyone relaxed and minding their own business and some small talk. When you're under pressure you will perform worse. It's been 4 years since then but your topic reminded me of it.
Your uncle and everyone else are just trying to help, giving you advice that it may have took them a couple of years to learn, but they don't realize they are putting pressure on you.