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How Girls Work - An Explanation

STRMfrmXMN
By STRMfrmXMN
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I think that, on a tech forum here, a few of us could use a nice explanation of why we haven't gotten anywhere with the ladies. Too often I see off-topic threads asking for help with girls. So here goes. Sorry if I offend anybody in the process. This topic will be as SFW as possible.

 

So, you are a nice guy yet you haven't gotten anywhere with the female species. Here's how girls work.

 

                        STRMfrmXMN's Guide To Guys Or Anybody Curious About How Women (Usually) Work:

Things girls like:

  • Good looks (duh)
  • Having a sense of humor 
  • Being friendly. Be chivalrous. Surprise her with flowers.
  • Having a set career path or giving a care about how you do in school
  • Being confident. A lot of "nice guys" never get anywhere because they get too shy/scared/nervous/panicked to tell a girl how they feel. Be a confident nice guy and you're already in good shape! Also, note the being confident does not mean being a dick.
  • Smelling nice (Old Spice and everything nice! I have found that Crew conditioner works wonders for scent. Some girls will prefer different smells if this wasn't obvious enough)
  • Having really nice hair (nod to the conditioner)
  • They like guys with guitars in their hands. Pianos, voices, drums - those work too.
  • Honesty is always a good policy.
  • Loyalty - don't cheat on her. Show up to any dates you make and don't stay in to play video games instead (or maybe invite her over to 720noscope all over those newbs)
  • Learn to cook. You will get laid doing this.

Things girls don't like:

  • Guys who talk about sex way too enthusiastically. Some girls may be into sex on the first date, though most don't want to hear nothing but all your hilarious experiences about hooking up with your sister's best friend last summer.
  • Guys who drink heavily, do drugs and get wasted and live with their parents at 39
  • Guys with no motivation to do anything; play an instrument, do sports, find a hobby of interest and be passionate about it!

Let it be known that, if you have to break a gal's heart at some point, do it kindly and let her down gracefully. You guys are bringing out bad traits in each other - time to let it go. 

If you think that a girl has any inclination of liking you then ask her out! No harm done if she says no! Just pick yourself up and carry on.

Come your first kiss - don't fret everything. It's a first for everybody and shouldn't be taken too seriously. Remember, you probably won't be with this person forever and it will all be a distant memory after awhile.

 

Remember when you think that she's the only girl that you'll ever be with EVER: "Everybody romanticizes somebody."(- Zooey Deschanel). You might go on misogynistic rants to yourself after she breaks up with you or rejects you. Within another month or two, all will be forgotten and you'll have found someone else.

 

 

Hope you understand women now!*

 

*Remember, I am not a licensed, professional girl so I may be wrong. Remember, every girl is different.. Even girls don't understand other girls so this is a guide,  not a rubric.

 

BECAUSE PEOPLE DON'T UNDERSTAND HOW A GUIDE WORKS - THIS IS NOT A BLACK AND WHITE RUBRIC ON HOW GIRLS WORK OK. THIS MAY NOT ALL BE PERFECTLY ACCURATE YA DINGUSES

|PSU Tier List /80 Plus Efficiency| PSU stuff if you need it. 

My system: PCPartPicker || For Corsair support tag @Corsair Josephor @Corsair Nick || My 5MT Legacy GT Wagon ||

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So if i date a girl who's a senior and i'm a freshman, is that totally like wicked awesome or is it just plain weird?

"If it has tits or tires, at some point you will have problems with it." -@vinyldash303

this is probably the only place i'll hang out anymore: http://linustechtips.com/main/topic/274320-the-long-awaited-car-thread/

 

Current Rig: Intel Core 2 Quad Q6600, Abit IN9-32MAX nForce 680i board, Galaxy GT610 1GB DDR3 gpu, Cooler Master Mystique 632S Full ATX case, 1 2TB Seagate Barracuda SATA and 1x200gb Maxtor SATA drives, 1 LG SATA DVD drive, Windows 10. All currently runs like shit :D 

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So if i date a girl who's a senior and i'm a freshman, is that totally like wicked awesome or is it just plain weird?

Are you totally wicked awesome? Then it's in the eye of yourself! Does she care about you the same way you care about her? Who cares what others think!

|PSU Tier List /80 Plus Efficiency| PSU stuff if you need it. 

My system: PCPartPicker || For Corsair support tag @Corsair Josephor @Corsair Nick || My 5MT Legacy GT Wagon ||

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The LinusTechTips forum is my trusted source for advice on women.

 

Better get my canoe ready for the flood, if you know what I mean. 

I'm going to tag an actual women since those are existent on this forum :P @BurgerBum

|PSU Tier List /80 Plus Efficiency| PSU stuff if you need it. 

My system: PCPartPicker || For Corsair support tag @Corsair Josephor @Corsair Nick || My 5MT Legacy GT Wagon ||

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Are you totally wicked awesome? Then it's in the eye of yourself! Does she care about you the same way you care about her? Who cares what others think!

But then there's the hard part. Choosing which senior to date. If you want to see them, their twitter links are in http://linustechtips.com/main/statuses/user/22427-terrytek/?status_id=83444

"If it has tits or tires, at some point you will have problems with it." -@vinyldash303

this is probably the only place i'll hang out anymore: http://linustechtips.com/main/topic/274320-the-long-awaited-car-thread/

 

Current Rig: Intel Core 2 Quad Q6600, Abit IN9-32MAX nForce 680i board, Galaxy GT610 1GB DDR3 gpu, Cooler Master Mystique 632S Full ATX case, 1 2TB Seagate Barracuda SATA and 1x200gb Maxtor SATA drives, 1 LG SATA DVD drive, Windows 10. All currently runs like shit :D 

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But then there's the hard part. Choosing which senior to date. If you want to see them, their twitter links are in http://linustechtips.com/main/statuses/user/22427-terrytek/?status_id=83444

If you're choosing between girls then you really don't have any sentimental attachment to them. Get to know them better before selecting them from a group. That just makes you look like an ass xD

|PSU Tier List /80 Plus Efficiency| PSU stuff if you need it. 

My system: PCPartPicker || For Corsair support tag @Corsair Josephor @Corsair Nick || My 5MT Legacy GT Wagon ||

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+1 for learning to cook. so many times I've been absolutely mauled by a girl after I cooked for her.

I think those are post-hibernation bears you've been feeding, my friend.

|PSU Tier List /80 Plus Efficiency| PSU stuff if you need it. 

My system: PCPartPicker || For Corsair support tag @Corsair Josephor @Corsair Nick || My 5MT Legacy GT Wagon ||

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Kinda subjective but my girlfriend likes me and my intense interest in computers and technology.

I don't cook, I barely have any hair (I use to when we first started dating though)...

 

I wouldn't exactly hug someone from behind, it's not a good idea if you aren't actually dating yet. Some women find it creepy, so I'd just not bother with that.

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Come your first kiss - don't fret everything. It's a first for everybody and shouldn't be taken too seriously. Remember, you probably won't be with this person forever and it will all be a distant memory after awhile.

 

Challenge-Accepted-Meme.jpg

  ﷲ   Muslim Member  ﷲ

KennyS and ScreaM are my role models in CSGO.

CPU: i3-4130 Motherboard: Gigabyte H81M-S2PH RAM: 8GB Kingston hyperx fury HDD: WD caviar black 1TB GPU: MSI 750TI twin frozr II Case: Aerocool Xpredator X3 PSU: Corsair RM650

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Does it count if I can cook 2-minute noodles?

I mean, who doesn't like a good spot of Top Ramen?

 

Kinda subjective but my girlfriend likes me and my intense interest in computers and technology.

I don't cook, I barely have any hair (I use to when we first started dating though)...

 

I wouldn't exactly hug someone from behind, it's not a good idea if you aren't actually dating yet. Some women find it creepy, so I'd just not bother with that.

Well then she likes you for who you are which is great!

Also, I have hugged a gal from behind who I though was.. ahem... interested and can say that positive things became of that so ya. All girls are different, of course.

|PSU Tier List /80 Plus Efficiency| PSU stuff if you need it. 

My system: PCPartPicker || For Corsair support tag @Corsair Josephor @Corsair Nick || My 5MT Legacy GT Wagon ||

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If you're choosing between girls then you really don't have any sentimental attachment to them. Get to know them better before selecting them from a group. That just makes you look like an ass xD

But i love them all equally. But i want someone i can love and cuddle with every day.

"If it has tits or tires, at some point you will have problems with it." -@vinyldash303

this is probably the only place i'll hang out anymore: http://linustechtips.com/main/topic/274320-the-long-awaited-car-thread/

 

Current Rig: Intel Core 2 Quad Q6600, Abit IN9-32MAX nForce 680i board, Galaxy GT610 1GB DDR3 gpu, Cooler Master Mystique 632S Full ATX case, 1 2TB Seagate Barracuda SATA and 1x200gb Maxtor SATA drives, 1 LG SATA DVD drive, Windows 10. All currently runs like shit :D 

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But i love them all equally. But i want someone i can love and cuddle with every day.

You have to be biased toward one of them.

  ﷲ   Muslim Member  ﷲ

KennyS and ScreaM are my role models in CSGO.

CPU: i3-4130 Motherboard: Gigabyte H81M-S2PH RAM: 8GB Kingston hyperx fury HDD: WD caviar black 1TB GPU: MSI 750TI twin frozr II Case: Aerocool Xpredator X3 PSU: Corsair RM650

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But i love them all equally. But i want someone i can love and cuddle with every day.

You like them all on a physical level - not a mental and emotional one - and need to get to learn them. The longer your conversations, the more you giggle (and you will, no matter how cold and soul-less you are :P) the longer you're going to be smiling like an idiot every night as you go to sleep thinking about her.

 

So talk to all of them, of course, and figure out who you match best. Pretty easy.

|PSU Tier List /80 Plus Efficiency| PSU stuff if you need it. 

My system: PCPartPicker || For Corsair support tag @Corsair Josephor @Corsair Nick || My 5MT Legacy GT Wagon ||

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I'm a total chick magnet, can confirm all of these :P

// irenebb-pc v5 // [ღ] Intel i5-9400F [ღ] Radeon VII Lisa Su Edition [ღ] 24GB Crucial Ballistix [ღ] Acer ED323QUR (1440p/144hz) [ღ]

 

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You have to be biased toward one of them.

I have a little bias towards one, but other than that, it's pretty equal.

"If it has tits or tires, at some point you will have problems with it." -@vinyldash303

this is probably the only place i'll hang out anymore: http://linustechtips.com/main/topic/274320-the-long-awaited-car-thread/

 

Current Rig: Intel Core 2 Quad Q6600, Abit IN9-32MAX nForce 680i board, Galaxy GT610 1GB DDR3 gpu, Cooler Master Mystique 632S Full ATX case, 1 2TB Seagate Barracuda SATA and 1x200gb Maxtor SATA drives, 1 LG SATA DVD drive, Windows 10. All currently runs like shit :D 

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Me while reading this:

 

Hang out with mostly girls as friends (and mostly not-straight ones at that) and you learn things every day xD I had to keep a few NSFW things out though....

|PSU Tier List /80 Plus Efficiency| PSU stuff if you need it. 

My system: PCPartPicker || For Corsair support tag @Corsair Josephor @Corsair Nick || My 5MT Legacy GT Wagon ||

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You like them all on a physical level - not a mental and emotional one - and need to get to learn them. The longer your conversations, the more you giggle (and you will, no matter how cold and soul-less you are :P) the longer you're going to be smiling like an idiot every night as you go to sleep thinking about her.

 

So talk to all of them, of course, and figure out who you match best. Pretty easy.

One of them i actually got to know, one actually has a class with me, and the other one i actually know how she feels over twitte.r

"If it has tits or tires, at some point you will have problems with it." -@vinyldash303

this is probably the only place i'll hang out anymore: http://linustechtips.com/main/topic/274320-the-long-awaited-car-thread/

 

Current Rig: Intel Core 2 Quad Q6600, Abit IN9-32MAX nForce 680i board, Galaxy GT610 1GB DDR3 gpu, Cooler Master Mystique 632S Full ATX case, 1 2TB Seagate Barracuda SATA and 1x200gb Maxtor SATA drives, 1 LG SATA DVD drive, Windows 10. All currently runs like shit :D 

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I have a little bias towards one, but other than that, it's pretty equal.

That's your answer.

  ﷲ   Muslim Member  ﷲ

KennyS and ScreaM are my role models in CSGO.

CPU: i3-4130 Motherboard: Gigabyte H81M-S2PH RAM: 8GB Kingston hyperx fury HDD: WD caviar black 1TB GPU: MSI 750TI twin frozr II Case: Aerocool Xpredator X3 PSU: Corsair RM650

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