Experiences with non-techies

[SansVarnic]

 

If you want, I have ALOT more stories from the past 5-6 years that are a barrel of laughs. Just lemme know

Do share....

[SansVarnic]

This and the rest (so..... painful)

<snip>

Does this kid know any other term than Ginormous? lol.

[BentheMuffin]

I was browsing amazon today and I found out that AMD has decided to spice up their GPU line with the brand new R9, now with 4k support!

[Sam Z Man]

This and the rest (so..... painful)

Yes he's stupid as fuck when it comes to PC's, but everyone on this form at one point was stupid as fuck when it came to PC's, we all start somewhere this guy was just unfortunate enough to upload his stupidity to the internet in video form.

[APersonWithABrokenChair]

I was browsing amazon today and I found out that AMD has decided to spice up their GPU line with the brand new R9, now with 4k support!

Its too common

[evilarceus]

Oh god, just thought of this.

 

I randomly said to my dad "I need a microSD card for my phone"

Dad: "Why, you need more space?"

Me: "Yes. Android takes up about half of my storage."

Dad: "Don't you already have an SD card that came with your phone?"

Me: "No."

Dad: "I thought you had an extra 2 GB."

I facepalmed.

Me: "Yeah, that's RAM!"

Dad: "..and you can store more things on that RAM."

I swear I facepalmed so hard it left a mark on my face.

Me: "I have 16 GB of internal storage, nothing else..."

Dad: "I thought Androids can only use microSD cards for storage..."

Me: "Yeah, try putting an SD card in your iPhone."

 

oh btw http://www.downloadmoreram.com/

[D13H4RD]

People who think the chip inside the battery of a Samsung Galaxy S3/Note 2/S4/Note 3/S5/Note 4 (or any other post-S3 and pre-S6 phone) is a chip designed to track and steal your data when it's really just a harmless NFC chip.

[Speedbird]

People who think the chip inside the battery of a Samsung Galaxy S3/Note 2/S4/Note 3/S5/Note 4 (or any other post-S3 and pre-S6 phone) is a chip designed to track and steal your data when it's really just a harmless NFC chip.

Doesn't it stand for NSA's Fish Control?

 

/s

[Akolyte]

This happened when I knew nothing about tech.... I was like 10 years old.

 

I installed 5 anti-virus, hoping to make my laptop "More Secured" but instead it slowed it down (yeah dat RAM usage was too damn real).

I was so f*cking confused, I didn't know anything about RAM that day so..... I couldn't help it....

I also didn't know anything about GPU and CPU, so I thought my laptop could run all games at the highest settings. It lagged and I didn't care, it blue screened my laptop....

I couldn't fix blue screen that day so I was so screwed.

 

Then that day my father called technician to fix his PC, I saw the technician's laptop, it was exactly the same as mine but it was way faster than my laptop. I was confused why his laptop was faster.... I asked him a lot of questions about PC....

 

Then when I became 11 years old I started to study about PC until now :3

I thought I told you only to use Microsoft Security Essentials!!!

[DimasRMDO]

I thought I told you only to use Microsoft Security Essentials!!!

No, no, I was 10 years old. I knew nothing about technology back then :3

[D13H4RD]

Doesn't it stand for NSA's Fish Control?

 

/s

LOL, I'm not sure if the guys over at the NSA actually have a pet fish.

[nekomata]

My dad has almost every major iphone since 2008. He asked me, just now, on how to download music to his iphone 6. I thought he was joking since he had music in his previous phones. Turns out his friends put them in there

[You_are_a_cunt]

By (not really) popular demand, here's another gem!

 

 

Like I've previously mentioned, I used to work for a (pretty big) ISP. First I was a field technician of sorts (we called ourselves fiber monkeys, since we mostly dealt with installing fiber or connecting new contracts to the grid) then I started working night shift at the support center.

 

Mid January, minus a billion and one degrees outside.

Me and my colleague were working a weekend shift, which is usually uneventful. Most we get is password resets or remote equipment reboots. No actual work was needed.

Somewhere around 2AM, basically mid-shift, we get a call from an infuriated customer complaining that the modem we provided was utter shit and that nothing works anymore (it might be worth mentioning that the ISP also provided cable TV and a landline - for kiddos, a landline is a fixed telephone infrastructure). Since the landline was separate from the TV and internet connection, it would usually work without the other two.

Anyway, after being called all sort of racial slurs that I don't think would go well with the CoC around here, we decided that we should go see what was actually wrong, since the equipment didn't ping and we couldn't remotely diagnose the problem. Since there were only three of us in the entire office (one of whom had been sleeping for the entire shift), me and the other guy hopped into the car and went on-site. Remember when I said it was minus a billion degrees? My butt froze within the 25 meters we had to walk through knee high snow to get to the car, which was parked outside (thankfully we didn't have to dig the car out of the snow). Butt freezing continues in the car, since the idiot that was responsible with maintaining the fleet never bothers actually FIXING those death traps, so AC was out of the discussion.

35 minutes later, we get to the guy's house. Mid 50s, living with his mom, about as slim as a whale, he "greeted" us with more racial slurs (note that none of them made no sense, since there was no racial difference. it's a thing some "people" do around here) and directed us to the "faulty" "piece of junk"(in his defense, it was a piece of junk, but we had no control over what we provided customers. we only dealt with installing them and maintenance). The "equipment" consists of a digital receiver and a custom-firmware modem/router.

 

The shit wasn't even plugged in. No power. OF COURSE IT WASN'T GOING TO WORK, DURR. Plug it in. No TV signal. Check the SIM card in the receiver. It wasn't there.

The guy had removed the SIM and put it in his mobile phone so "he could watch TV on it". /facepalm

One problem sorted. On to the next.

Modem wasn't plugged in either. fixed. NOPE.

The external connection (as in the WAN cable) wasn't plugged into the LAN port. it was plugged into port 1. LAN cable from modem to PC was plugged into the WAN port. And port 3 or the same modem. /nucularfacepalm

Sorted.

 

At this point it was nearly 4AM and the guy's mother woke up, saw us, got scared, called the police. We were in our work clothes, with the ISP's name and logo on them.

Police comes, almost arrests us for "breaking and entering". Thankfully guy saves us from a trip to the precinct and his mom gets a nice little fine. Cops were as pissed off as we were that we all had to come to this one house on the other side of the city for nothing.

 

After this entire fiasco, we head back to the office. Third guy working that shift was still sleeping and there were 0 other calls while we were gone. 5 minutes into our asses thawing, BOOM. A call. From the guy. We both said fuck it and woke up McSleepy and sent him to deal with the guy. I've never seen someone talking on the phone be so scared in his entire life.

Apparently the guy called back to complain that his mom got a fine form the police because of us (eh?) and demanded that we pay for it. Fat chance.

 

Out of pure curiosity I checked the inbound and outbound packet requests prior to someone deciding to rewire the connections (we were allowed to do that; it was even mentioned in the contracts we made with customers). I'm not saying the guy watched some occasional pr0n on his computer. I'm saying the guy had a computer FOR watching pr0n. Every single inbound or outbound request was from pr0n sites. EVERY SINGLE ONE OF THEM. I didn't even know someone could watch that much porn.

 

Turns out the guy was mental and his mother refused to let him take his medication or stay in a nuthouse. Whodda thunk...

[DigitalHermit]

-story of three corporate slaves, two cops, a nutjob, and his mother-

 

Please sir. I want some more.

[You_are_a_cunt]

Please sir. I want some more.

 

At this rate I'll be spending more time here posting stories form previous jobs than actually working (not that I ever actually work). Hold on to your butts and wait a while

[DigitalHermit]

At this rate I'll be spending more time here posting stories form previous jobs than actually working (not that I ever actually work). Hold on to your butts and wait a while

 

Worry not... I'm occupied from 7am-6pm JST now...

 

On Topic;

Worked on a machine infested by browser hijacker and adware...

1 sweep malwarebytes + manual removal + 1 more sweep of malwarebytes to be sure...

Malware-b-gone!

 

Oh and the people supervising me got confused when they saw I have more than 6 tabs open along with 12 text files... I was working on only three windows (2 windows for reference/output, 1 for code)at a time back then... (I usually work with 5 windows up... 4 windows for reference/output and 1 for code...)

[IMPERIUS]

A friend of mine said he is buying a new pc (his old one was 8 years old, couldn't do anything). So I offered my help, said the best thing to do is to assemble it and that I will help him. His budget was 1000€ including the monitor and os. I made him a nice i5-4440, h81, 8gb ram, 1tb hdd, 120gb ssd, 200r, 500w, r9 280 build (could actually get an 970 if we lived in the us...) on pcpp.

 

I message him saying whats up, when will he buy the components and he says that he already has it, a guy assembled it for him. I ask him which components do you have, he says i5-4440 and gtx 750 (I believe its a ti version, he is tech savvy so I guess he wasn't paying attention to this). 

 

A couple of things bother me, most of all, I first said to him that he should build it, I made him a list of components, gave him even links to stores and he asks a random dude from his school which doesn't even know that a 750ti is not to be paired with an i5 but with an i3? My "friend" said it works like a rocket. Yeah I bet. Will be checking it out on sunday and will post an update if anyone is interested.

 

I also bet he used an ultra shitty case, psu and mobo

also @ObeseWalrus you might get a laugh out of this

[Frankie]

-Snip-

 

Am I the only one here who said to a friend what to buy, he bought exactly that and I assembled it, done ?

[waggythegeek]

Am I the only one here who said to a friend what to buy, he bought exactly that and I assembled it, done ?

yep. Although I may soon join the club...

[JSind11]

Roses are red violets are blue

This thread makes no sense

Elephant football wizard

[Kawaii Besu]

"4GBs RAM on a Mac is like 16GBs RAM on a PC"

 

"4GBs RAM on a Mac is like 16GBs RAM on a PC"

 

"4GBs RAM on a Mac is like 16GBs RAM on a PC"

[Frankie]

-snip-

 

Also

''Macs destroy PC's at rendering video''

 

[SansVarnic]

I read that then I was I was like . . . 

 

 

Explain it as the Duke would.  B)

[BlazingGunnerFTW]

Here is the thing about the build I was about to do. This is a very insane story. So we kind of do a test bench, and it works. So he tries to put the IO shield on. He manages to make his fingers bleed. Then making it my fault, by saying, you didn't warn me. A fucking sharp peice of metal is going to cut you. Learn some fucking common sense. Anyways, that made my aunt freak out, saying now he needs stitches, despite the bleeding stopped in like 5 minutes. And you can meet my bi polar, living on alimony and child support and divorced aunt, which you know which didn't help matters either. Then he gets super frustrated at ME that the CPU cooler is hard to get on. Then he says its to small despite it fit everything. Then I get blamed for everything and then my crazyass aunt starts talking to her boyfriend, which says at Lincoln tech, u need to needs gloves and be grounded. Assholes. Then she started to bitch about me to my cousin, saying she should have never had me over. Well I am like screw you u fucking snarks and I just went home. My fucking god. Society is really awful.They know no shit. Assholes.

[waggythegeek]

Roses are red violets are blue

This thread makes no sense

Elephant football wizard

Roses are red

Violets are blue

If you don't like Christmas you're prolly a jew