Search: Your BEST IT Joke

[djboy6480]

Hi there, I am stuck here backing up files and I am board as hell

How many programmers does it take to change a light bulb?

--> None, that's a hardware problem.

 

How many Microsoft employees does it take to change a light bulb?

--> None, they just declare darkness the new standard.

Can you list all of the public top level domains?

--> ICANN

Why do Python Devs need glasses? Because they don't C#

I love pressing F5. It's so refreshing.


Now it's your turn!

[samcool55]

An SQL query walks up to two tables in a restaurant and asks: "Mind if i join you?"

[GrockleTD]

Why is Notch hyperactive? its all dat Java...

[TacoSenpai]

There's two kinds of people in this world those who can extrapolate data from incomplete information and...

[Ashiella]

Why did Bill Gates name his company after his penis? Because Jobs 8-bit his apples. (cringey)

[AncientNerd]

There are 10 kinds of people the the world, those that understand binary and those that don't.

[Razor Blade]

What does windows security and donuts have in common.... they both have holes

[Lenovo1984]

21 minutes ago, AncientNerd said:

There are 10 kinds of people the the world, those that understand binary and those that don't.

I've seen that on a shirt somewhere. 

[AncientNerd]

8 minutes ago, Lenovo1984 said:

I've seen that on a shirt somewhere. 

Yea it's an old, old joke. I think I heard it for the first time in the mid 1970's and it was old then.

[DimasRMDO]

I'm going to talk about UDP, it's going to be quick, but I don't think you'll get it though.

[djboy6480]

3 minutes ago, DimasRMDO said:

I'm going to talk about UDP, it's going to be quick, but I don't think you'll get it though.

you mean: I'm going to talk about UDP, it's going to be quick, but I don't know if you'll get it though.  

[djboy6480]

Multicast jokes are awesome. But you'll get them only if you bother to listen.

[djboy6480]

Five routers walk into a bar. One of the routers goes up to the bartender and asks for four jack and cokes, and one water with lime. A drunk patron overheads, laughs, and asks the router, "Who’s the water for?" "I’m the designated router," he replies.

[newgeneral10]

My favorite Tinder Pickup Line:

 

"My servers never go down, but I sure do ;)"

[moderategamer]

1 hour ago, AncientNerd said:

There are 10 kinds of people the the world, those that understand binary and those that don't.

well now I have to change my signature

[DexterSmythe]

In order to understand recursion you must first understand recursion.

[Lurick]

A BGP Update walks into a CRS-1. He walks back out with a corrupt optional transitive attribute.

 

A tcp packet walks in to a bar and says “I want a beer”, barman says “you want a beer?” and tcp packet says “yes, a beer”

[RollTime]

This is an XKCD comic I love:

[geo3]

"Hi, I'd like to hear a TCP joke."

"Hello, would you like to hear a TCP joke?"

"Yes, I'd like to hear a TCP joke."

"OK, I'll tell you a TCP joke."

"Ok, I will hear a TCP joke."

"Are you ready to hear a TCP joke?"

"Yes, I am ready to hear a TCP joke."

"Ok, I am about to send the TCP joke. It will last 10 seconds, it has two characters, it does not have a setting, it ends with a punchline."

"Ok, I am ready to get your TCP joke that will last 10 seconds, has two characters, does not have an explicit setting, and ends with a punchline."

"I'm sorry, your connection has timed out. Hello, would you like to hear a TCP joke?"

[Razor Blade]

Even if your floppy disk becomes a hard drive, be careful where you put your USB stick because you might get a virus.

[Hiitchy]

7 hours ago, samcool55 said:

An SQL query walks up to two tables in a restaurant and asks: "Mind if i join you?"

I will drop you so hard on this table....

[Razor Blade]

What computer brand would a Pop singer buy?

 

Adele