At what age will let kids date?

[Lii]

25 minutes ago, whm1974 said:

What makes you even think that I have no idea what I talking about? Just because I don't have any kids? I used to babysit from time to time... I have friends with children, grown now but...

I had no idea that you didn't have any kids

And not, just having some experience with kids doesn't actually mean that you do have any understanding in any medical aspects of them

 

I'm not trying to flame with any of you, nor do I want to

 

I just think that people without any foundaments should not be allowed to be considered as trustworthy, this whole discussion is not so different by discussuons made by antivaxers or anti5g, they do lack to every type of foundation to be able to understand even of what they are talking about, but they do still want to be listened 

 

Even if the point of this discussion was to collect opinions.. well that's my opinion on the discussion

 

[whm1974]

9 minutes ago, Lii said:

I had no idea that you didn't have any kids

And not, just having some experience with kids doesn't actually mean that you do have any understanding in any medical aspects of them

 

I'm not trying to flame with any of you, nor do I want but I just think that people without any foundaments should not be allowed to be considered as trustworthy, this whole discussion is not so different by discussuons made by antivaxers or anti5g, they do lack to every type of foundation to be able to understand even of what they are talking about, but they do still want to be listened 

 

I mentioned that I have no Children in my OP. And with having no Foundation, I was a Child once, just like everyone else. I merely notice that kids are doing thing much younger then I was growing up?

 

What started this is due to reading an Article about Netflix's  Cuties which features 11 Y/O girls not properly dressed for their age and dancing in such a manner that Adults back when I was their age, would have Freaked Out. Note I'm in my Mid-40's.

[Dedayog]

2 hours ago, whm1974 said:

Now I don't have any kids but for years I kept hearing about kids who are not even teenagers dating and sometime a bit more... For example my half brother who I met at 8, had girlfriends at that tender age... I did wonder since he had o many girls came over an call him so often if he was doing anything much farther then Playing Doctor with them...

 

Now stuff I'm hearing and reading about Precocious Puberty and Sexuallation by Media of Preteens, that if I had any daughters aged 10-12 I wouldn't let them walk out the door...

 

Seriously how old do you require you kids to be before letting them Date at all?

Definitely a good off topic thread... preteen sexual habits

 

To be frank.. be careful with this...  Asking about dating is one thing, but mentioning playing doctor and sexualization... may be construed.

 

On the other hand... 14.  Mine was allowed ice cream dates or skating or mall stuff, etc.

 

Edit:  On the other other hand, why are you asking about this if you do not have kids?  Since I read more of the thread and there is way too much talk of 8 years old and sex.  

[GDRRiley]

I run along the lines of high school is when children should start to consider being in relationships. my younger sister got some in middle school and they were pretty stupid and childish

 

[whm1974]

2 minutes ago, Dedayog said:

Definitely a good off topic thread... preteen sexual habits

 

To be frank.. be careful with this...  Asking about dating is one thing, but mentioning playing doctor and sexualization... may be construed.

 

On the other hand... 14.  Mine was allowed ice cream dates or skating or mall stuff, etc.

I no intention of causing offense here. Or getting some kicks out of this.

[Lii]

1 hour ago, whm1974 said:

I mentioned that I have no Children in my OP.

Yeah.. my bad I forgot about that, but the point wherever you do have child or not still remains

Quote

And with having no Foundation, I was a Child once, just like everyone else.

Yeah.. but that doesn't mean that you do actually have any knowledge in medical subjects

It's like saying I do have experience with girls by so I do want to be a gynecologist

Quote

I merely notice that kids are doing thing much younger then I was growing up?

 

What started this is due to reading an Article about Netflix's  Cuties which features 11 Y/O girls not properly dressed for their age and dancing in such a manner that Adults back when I was their age, would have Freaked Out. Note I'm in my Mid-40's.

That really depends on the historical year of reference and region

 

Not in all nations the age of consent is 16/18 like in the us nor in all nations/locations a type of dress is consider proper, like our way of dressing in some majour religious contry would be considered something for depraved

 

It also depends on the year of reference I'm pretty sure that an average person of the 1800 would consider depravating our way of dressing also in the past (and still right now it depends on location) it was not so uncommon to give birth like at 13

the morale it's not something prefixed and objective it can vary

 

 

Meanwhile if you were asking on why do children mature faster nowdays, it's thinked that environment could have contributed to that and it might be linked even to obesity, majour food resources than in the past could help children to devolped faster than in the past (which btw the medium nowdays for girls is ±9y'o for boys ±11 y'o)

Doi: 10.1055/s-0033-1348891

 

[Praesi]

That depends of what kind of date. I had "handholding" things with 14. But the first relationship that was more than that was with 16 and lasted 2.5 years.. And thats how it should be. Any Age below is wrong in my Eyes.

[Guest]

I told my Daughter 30 years old, she can have a boyfriend.

 

Self first. Career first. None of this "I'm pregnant daddy" Bull****

 

No, I'm not kidding. Don't bring a boy home. It won't start well. 

 

 

[Bad5ector]

@Tristerin While I think that is an interesting take. I hear that teenagers like to rebel against these things called rules.

 

But I do agree that knowing that both the kids can maintain a discipline like that is good if not great way to build character. 

[Tristerin]

Just now, Bad5ector said:

@Tristerin While I think that is an interesting take. I hear that teenagers like to rebel against these things called rules.

 

But I do agree that knowing that both the kids can maintain a discipline like that is good if not great way to build character. 

Agree, and I was 10 foot tall and bullet proof until I got wiser lol so I get it.  As I mention in my first post - I hope this works  If not, cut another angle and try something else 

[Guest]

17 minutes ago, Benji said:

Which is a nice trick to get your children to not know how relationships work and fail miserably without anybody to appropriately support them when they're supposed to happen. When they're at your home and in their teens you can "guide them" and be their for their first "heartbreak", but when it happens at that age at which you'd like it, they're kind of done.

Boys only think of one thing. I shouldn't have to spell this out.....

 

My first was born when I was 27. My parents didnt have to raise me and my babies....

 

I have simple rules. Goes for my boys too. 

They get a girl  knocked up, you're moving out in 30 days. But school.... nope. That's now also your own responsibility. 

 

Wanna act like a grown up? Gotta be one first.

 

Oh and how relationships work is simple. They see one everyday. 

Since birth.

My wife and I set the example. They know what to expect. They've seen the good and bad of relationships. They are fully part of our relationship. 

 

They can have a serious adult relationship once fully grown up to an actual adult and go have their sex life all they want. 

 

 

 

 

[whm1974]

Not what I was reading but this why I created this Topic:

https://summit.news/2020/08/20/new-netflix-movie-celebrates-11-year-old-girls-twerking/

Note I'm not saying that preteens should be covered head to foot... But ...

[Bad5ector]

1 minute ago, Tristerin said:

Agree, and I was 10 foot tall and bullet proof until I got wiser lol so I get it.  As I mention in my first post - I hope this works  If not, cut another angle and try something else 

Hey man, we were all there at some point. I know when I was a teenager, I was really a big gym buff, but at the same time, I drank, smoked dope, and only cared about bumping nasties. Hormones and peer pressure are a bitch. Though can't say if I was in your shoes I wouldn't think something similar. Luckily me and my wife are only concerned about fur babies.

[whm1974]

6 minutes ago, ShrimpBrime said:

I have simple rules. Goes for my boys too. 

They get a girl  knocked up, you're moving out in 30 days. But school.... nope. That's now also your own responsibility. 

 

Wanna act like a grown up? Gotta be one first.

So if they knocked up a girl at well below 18?

 

[Guest]

1 minute ago, whm1974 said:

So if they knocked up a girl Below 18...

Well that depends on what the state wants to do because then they are a criminal....

 

And if I gotta pay for that, life for my sons will be rough. I'll be the new drill instructor at 4am everyday. They'll be working and going to school full time both. 

 

Babies are so important and need a lot of attention. A kid doesnt have time to be an accidental father.

[whm1974]

5 minutes ago, ShrimpBrime said:

Well that depends on what the state wants to do because then they are a criminal....

 

And if I gotta pay for that, life for my sons will be rough. I'll be the new drill instructor at 4am everyday. They'll be working and going to school full time both. 

 

Babies are so important and need a lot of attention. A kid doesnt have time to be an accidental father.

I was speaking of the boy, his age. Sorry not being clear...

[Guest]

13 minutes ago, whm1974 said:

I was speaking of the boy, his age. Sorry not being clear...

Hes 19.

[whm1974]

9 minutes ago, ShrimpBrime said:

Hes 19.

Well in that case... He should take care of any girl he knocks up... Of course he should have worn a Raincoat in the first place...

[Guest]

30 minutes ago, whm1974 said:

Well in that case... He should take care of any girl he knocks up... Of course he should have worn a Raincoat in the first place...

Accidents happen.

 

It's super difficult.... But young parents will have it rough/er than most that got into a good career first.

 

Forced to work full time at a young age deters people from education first. 

Babies cost so much in health care, can you imagine the cost of Birth alone?

Owe a hospital some 35,000 US dollars just for the birth. That does not include all the extras.

[Guest]

I was killing it in Pre-school. It can be any age really. Not a big deal.

[piratemonkey]

2 hours ago, ShrimpBrime said:

Owe a hospital some 35,000 US dollars just for the birth. That does not include all the extras.

laughs in Canada

[dalekphalm]

4 hours ago, ShrimpBrime said:

Accidents happen.

They do - but when properly used, birth control is very effective. Especially if overlapping contraceptive is used (eg: condom + the pill/IUD).

 

Forcing celibacy as a birth control method on teens statistically is simply not a good strategy.

 

Maybe it works for your kids - and as long as you're ensuring your kid is well educated on sexual health/education, including the effective use of contraceptives (how to put a condom on properly, for example)? Then I guess the harm is minimal.

 

But not allowing your teen child to have any romantic relationships at all is putting them at a disadvantage later in life. Maybe they'll overcome the disadvantage. But it'll still be there.

 

Now on the flip side, if they have no interest in having relationships, yeah cool - obviously you can't force that upon them.

 

But if they do, and you're banning them from having one, at best you're just alienating your kid. At worst, they're doing it anyway and you simply have no idea it's happening. In fact, when relationships and sex are banned for teens, they're the most likely to do it anyway but be less educated about it and end up with a teen pregnancy.

4 hours ago, ShrimpBrime said:

It's super difficult.... But young parents will have it rough/er than most that got into a good career first.

Which is totally why you should be educating your kid fully regarding relationships and sex so that if they do have sex (which for a teen is not quite but almost inevitable, statistically), they're doing it safely instead of, say - pulling out (or putting a condom on backwards, or using something makeshift like a plastic sandwich baggy (yes that happens, and ew) - so on and so forth).

4 hours ago, ShrimpBrime said:

Forced to work full time at a young age deters people from education first. 

Babies cost so much in health care, can you imagine the cost of Birth alone?

Owe a hospital some 35,000 US dollars just for the birth. That does not include all the extras.

Yeah that's an American healthcare system is broken problem. Every other civilized country doesn't have to worry about that.

[Mooshi]

Kids don't know what actual love with, it's infatuation in the younger years. As such, I see it as harmless, but not something they should put too much focus on. If we treated it serious, I could easily say I had a GF at 5, though I'm sure she was into my puppy.

 

While it's possible to marry a highschool sweetheart like my ex Amber ended up doing, it's not the norm. I'd say if we're being realistic, it's kinda pointless to put that much effort into a relationship when you're in your teens. Have fun with it, learn from them, but don't make it your entire life.

[whm1974]

I wonder if I come across and sound like some old Fart who Believes that things were better when he was a kid to current kids? You know the kind who Yells at Children to Get off His Lawn?

[whm1974]

2 minutes ago, Saakosome said:

it must be after at least 20 years. even if the child has independence, it is still not a reason

You really don't expect anyone to still be a Virgin at 20+ do you? Especially Young Women...