Why do my parents HATE video games?

[Amazonsucks]

4 hours ago, AngryBeaver said:

It isn't the games they have a problem with. They are how kids these days get completely lost in them and that is ALL they want to do. They let games consume their lives and then act like little moody assholes anytime they don't get to play them.

 

I am someone who use to play a TON of games and still would if I had time, but I have seen the effect it has on my teenager and it can easily become an unhealthy addiction for our youth, hell they are trying to make video game addiction an actual medical condition. They have already in some places acknowledged video game withdraws.

 

Next is the fact this is your MOTHER. She has the ultimate say in what Is acceptable for you until you are 18 or as long as you live under her roof (whichever comes last). Making you give up games means you have more time to focus on your studies, get a hobby, take up sports, plan out your future, learn something useful (like coding), or read. I know it seems unfair now, but in the end she is doing you a favor. TBH, I wish my parents were more concerned with my game playing when I was in my teens. Then again I did play sports and have a healthy social life that took up my time too.

If they do make it a medical condition im going to get in line to get free government money for help with it, just to make a point about how absurd that is.

[pipnina]

10 hours ago, AngryBeaver said:

It isn't the games they have a problem with. They are how kids these days get completely lost in them and that is ALL they want to do. They let games consume their lives and then act like little moody assholes anytime they don't get to play them.

 

I am someone who use to play a TON of games and still would if I had time, but I have seen the effect it has on my teenager and it can easily become an unhealthy addiction for our youth, hell they are trying to make video game addiction an actual medical condition. They have already in some places acknowledged video game withdraws.

 

Next is the fact this is your MOTHER. She has the ultimate say in what Is acceptable for you until you are 18 or as long as you live under her roof (whichever comes last). Making you give up games means you have more time to focus on your studies, get a hobby, take up sports, plan out your future, learn something useful (like coding), or read. I know it seems unfair now, but in the end she is doing you a favor. TBH, I wish my parents were more concerned with my game playing when I was in my teens. Then again I did play sports and have a healthy social life that took up my time too.

Parents should not be dictators to teenagers, nor should they just leave them completely alone. Also in the current economy there are plenty of 25 year olds living with their parents (my sister has a full time job at 26, and could live on her own with some small difficulty but chooses to stay at home with the family for the time. Similar goes for several at her workplace). "Yeah we know you're 26, but you live under our christian roof and I won't have none of that sexy business going on" <- unacceptable behaviour from a parent.

 

Not to say parents should be powerless. Even at 26 she is expected to maintain the house she is in, as we all are. Washing dishes, doing laundry and some cleaning. That's to be expected in any house sharing relationship. A parent of a child of most ages should be encouraging and expecting their kid to be doing basic chores.

 

My main point is, you can't just say "NO VIDEO GAMES, THATS DA LAW IN DIS HAUS" without breeding contempt. You could say "Video games, only if homework and some extra study is done this week, lights off at 11". It imposes limits, a task to be performed before they can play games, and it will be easier for them to understand and not hate you for than just arbitrarily banning video games.

 

If you want teens to "go out and find a hobby" you need to lead them to it. That doesn't mean you should make them go out and do football or join a club they have no interest in, but help them to find a hobby they like. Introduce them to new things like a parent is supposed to. Model building, electronics, astronomy, kart racing. They're going to like something, you just need to find it.

 

As is said by a popular character in DotA2: "Balance in all things".

[GilmourD]

On 11/9/2018 at 8:30 PM, iKingRPG said:

Just because our parents didn't grow up with something means it is bad? My mom sometimes plays like candy crush or something like once a year, but I play a game for 30 minutes and she stops me and makes me read or study. I don't get it. I'm good in school, why are my parents so against games? I get she wants me to spend time with my family but I do and we are far aged apart. I'm not just here to complain about my parents. So I usually don't even play games that long but she recently forbided me from video games. The sad part is I have been using all I have recently to upgrade my PC. She says it ruins our life and only losers play games. She says: "no one I know plays video games. Except (that guy) that eats candy and plays on his phone instead of working." And here I am trying so hard not to be rude so I don't get in trouble. She also hates gaming YouTubers and says they have child minds. RIP me will this have an impact on me? I also mostly play free games because my mom thinks losers spend money on games. I wonder how much she would laugh if she knew espn endorsed Ninja.

I'm going to guess based on your use of popular phrases and words that you're of high school or college age.

That means I'm probably old enough to be your dad, at least biologically. I'm 39 as of two days ago.

 

I have two kids of my own, 8.5 and 3. I have no problem with them playing games or watching YouTube as long as there's some moderation (they get an hour or two and then have to go outside and play with real humans).

 

Your parents are lame.

[LexCalifornia]

On 11/10/2018 at 2:30 AM, iKingRPG said:

Just because our parents didn't grow up with something means it is bad? My mom sometimes plays like candy crush or something like once a year, but I play a game for 30 minutes and she stops me and makes me read or study. I don't get it. I'm good in school, why are my parents so against games? I get she wants me to spend time with my family but I do and we are far aged apart. I'm not just here to complain about my parents. So I usually don't even play games that long but she recently forbided me from video games. The sad part is I have been using all I have recently to upgrade my PC. She says it ruins our life and only losers play games. She says: "no one I know plays video games. Except (that guy) that eats candy and plays on his phone instead of working." And here I am trying so hard not to be rude so I don't get in trouble. She also hates gaming YouTubers and says they have child minds. RIP me will this have an impact on me? I also mostly play free games because my mom thinks losers spend money on games. I wonder how much she would laugh if she knew espn endorsed Ninja.

Argue with facts.

 

#1: Playing Video Games is Good for your Brain - IFLSCIENECE

https://www.iflscience.com/brain/playing-video-games-good-your-brain-here-s-how/

 

#2: Playing Video Games is Good for your Brain - WaPo

https://www.washingtonpost.com/posteverything/wp/2014/11/11/playing-video-games-is-good-for-your-brain/?utm_term=.b3542df43edc

 

#3: More on Video Games: Good for your Brain & Job - HultEDU

http://www.hult.edu/blog/more-on-video-games-good-for-your-brain-and-good-for-your-job/

 

Still get some fresh air from time to time. There's nothing more satisfying than ripping some tricks on your skateboard and drinking an ice cold milkshake at the next best park near you.

 

[GilmourD]

On 11/10/2018 at 2:23 AM, LinusTech said:

My son probably spends 2-5 hours a week playing games during the winter. Closer to 1-2 in the summer. 

 

When I'm hooked on something he ends up watching me play sometimes, but I'm finally done BotW so it hasn't been an issue for the last couple weeks haha.... 

 

Still haven't figured out what will be considered acceptable once he's older. The weird thing is that I parlayed my love of gaming and PCs into a successful career, but I still see it largely as a spectacular waste of time given that the odds of becoming me (or Ninja or whatever else) are pretty slim without also investing significant time into something else - STEM, business skills, etc.. 

Interestingly, as a student at New Jersey Institute of Technology, an actual state university, you can get a degree in IT with a concentration in game design. My concentration is in networking and security but there's some degree requirements which overlap, such as the class I'm currently taking which will have us using the Unity engine for rudimentary game design. There can actually be careers in game design and the desire to do that has to start somewhere, right?

[iKingRPG]

2 hours ago, GilmourD said:

I'm going to guess based on your use of popular phrases and words that you're of high school or college age.

That means I'm probably old enough to be your dad, at least biologically. I'm 39 as of two days ago.

 

I have two kids of my own, 8.5 and 3. I have no problem with them playing games or watching YouTube as long as there's some moderation (they get an hour or two and then have to go outside and play with real humans).

 

Your parents are lame.

Happy late birthday.

 

The interesting thing is I've never known my parents to be very strict, execpt when it comes to things like video games.

 

Also I'm only 13.

 

My parents are nice with other things though. It could be that the only person their age they know that plays video games if a broke guy that never does his work.

[GilmourD]

36 minutes ago, iKingRPG said:

Happy late birthday.

 

The interesting thing is I've never known my parents to be very strict, execpt when it comes to things like video games.

 

Also I'm only 13.

 

My parents are nice with other things though. It could be that the only person their age they know that plays video games if a broke guy that never does his work.

Thanks.

 

Well, you can tell your parents that I'm a responsible parent married to a college English professor and I'm the systems administrator and lead technician for a public school system. AND I also game.

 

Maybe one of them used to play Team Fortress 2 and I scared them to death using my gaming persona - [TC]CreepingDeath. 

 

Just remember... Always be respectful. I know at 13 that's probably easier said than done (Jeebus knows I was a brat at 13). Make sure you do your chores, get your homework done, and kick butt in school. When my son (who's 8.5) gets out of hand I do take away screen time from him. However, he's been good and he's actually sitting about 10 feet behind me at his computer (which I built for him) building stuff in Minecraft.

[iKingRPG]

54 minutes ago, GilmourD said:

Thanks.

 

Well, you can tell your parents that I'm a responsible parent married to a college English professor and I'm the systems administrator and lead technician for a public school system. AND I also game.

 

Maybe one of them used to play Team Fortress 2 and I scared them to death using my gaming persona - [TC]CreepingDeath. 

 

Just remember... Always be respectful. I know at 13 that's probably easier said than done (Jeebus knows I was a brat at 13). Make sure you do your chores, get your homework done, and kick butt in school. When my son (who's 8.5) gets out of hand I do take away screen time from him. However, he's been good and he's actually sitting about 10 feet behind me at his computer (which I built for him) building stuff in Minecraft.

Thanks. Yeah that is the reason half of the stuff people are saying I can't do. For example @Amazonsuckskeeps telling me to do stuff that would get me in trouble. I'll just start showing my parents all the successful people that game and watch YouTube and stuff. You know I still love Minecraft and just seeing a Minecraft commercial even makes me want to build something. I don't know why but I think that Minecraft is something I will not be forgetting about for a LONG time. Thanks a lot.

[nekogod]

I'm not sure it's to do with parents not having grown up with games. Unless they're pretty old.

 

Video games as entertainment have been around for over 40 years and really took off in the 80's, 30 years ago.

 

The average gamer is 40/60 female/male and 35 years old.

 

It's more likely that like any hobby or form of entertainment they think moderation is good. Gaming is good for reaction times and hand eye coordination, it can also help with lateral thinking and problem solving. However it's poor physical exercise and can keep you indoors too much. It's also important to get outside and get some exercise and fresh air. So a mix of activities is important.

 

Although there is a negative stereotype affixed to gamers of the greasy fat guy living in his mums basement that some parents do seem to cling to and it's unfortunate but there isn't all that much you can do about it.

 

And I agree with Linus here, gaming in general will almost always be a waste of time with minor health perks/detriments (same as watching tv or playing sports) as only a tiny sliver of gamers go on to game professionally either in e-sports or youtube so odds are it won't happen to you.

 

So you can't really blame your parents for wanting you to spend your free time doing and learning things that are more likely to be beneficial to you when you're working on your career.

[Velcade]

Do you watch TV?  Trade your TV time for video game time.

 

Prove you can play for an hour then put it down and go do something productive.  

[Automobili3XF]

Just came to talk about my family, is it weird that they actually encouraged me to keep playing vidya?

Like, my mom almost always gave me the consoles and even the games from time to time, she says she rather have me at home playing games than on the street doing bad shit with the street punks.

Even when i didn't have the consoles right away, like in the PS1 and PS2 era my grandpa took me to the video game stores where they sold games and you could pay to play the consoles by hour.

Even to this day, last year she gave me a fully fledged PS4 Pro as a birthday gift without me even asking, i just casually mentioned one day that i was planning on buying one.

But then again, i always behaved myself, i never let the video game actually cripple my performance in school (work nowadays) or anything like that, perhaps that's the reason.

[AngryBeaver]

On 11/11/2018 at 7:45 AM, pipnina said:

Parents should not be dictators to teenagers, nor should they just leave them completely alone. Also in the current economy there are plenty of 25 year olds living with their parents (my sister has a full time job at 26, and could live on her own with some small difficulty but chooses to stay at home with the family for the time. Similar goes for several at her workplace). "Yeah we know you're 26, but you live under our christian roof and I won't have none of that sexy business going on" <- unacceptable behaviour from a parent.

 

Not to say parents should be powerless. Even at 26 she is expected to maintain the house she is in, as we all are. Washing dishes, doing laundry and some cleaning. That's to be expected in any house sharing relationship. A parent of a child of most ages should be encouraging and expecting their kid to be doing basic chores.

 

My main point is, you can't just say "NO VIDEO GAMES, THATS DA LAW IN DIS HAUS" without breeding contempt. You could say "Video games, only if homework and some extra study is done this week, lights off at 11". It imposes limits, a task to be performed before they can play games, and it will be easier for them to understand and not hate you for than just arbitrarily banning video games.

 

If you want teens to "go out and find a hobby" you need to lead them to it. That doesn't mean you should make them go out and do football or join a club they have no interest in, but help them to find a hobby they like. Introduce them to new things like a parent is supposed to. Model building, electronics, astronomy, kart racing. They're going to like something, you just need to find it.

 

As is said by a popular character in DotA2: "Balance in all things".

I am going to disagree with this. There are tons of different ways to parent your kids and many of them work just fine. Just because you don't think a parent should dictate doesn't mean it is the wrong approach. There is a time and place for strict rules or restrictions. It is not YOUR place to tell another parent how to raise their children.

 

Also your sister story is nice and all, but it is also irrelevant. If she is living at home with your parents, they might not have the same control they use to, but they STILL get to decide what happens under THEIR roof. If they say no sexy time, then I think that is 100% acceptable and not unacceptable at all. She is more than happy to do that at his place, get a hotel, or get her own place.

 

Also the "breeding contempt" point you raise... that is something that will happen at some point for pretty much any good/responsible parent. We aren't here to be your friend at all times. We are here to make sure you grow up to be a responsible and well balanced adult. You can't do that without making decisions that will cause contempt and you cannot be the parent you should if you are afraid of that fact. My parents did some things I was very angry about and completely disagreed with, but now that I am grown and have kids of my own I can only see the wisdom in it. I never stopped loving my parents or anything like that. I might have felt I hated them at the time, but that is just foolish childhood emotions.

 

In this day and age spanking is becoming more and more frowned upon and now we use talking, loss of privileges, and restrictions to enforce punishment for bad behavior. This isn't necessarily for bad behavior, but it is likely because the parents are trying to emphasize other parts of life that the OP is lacking in. Anyways my point above is that hard restrictions are something that has been bread more by current society and from what I can see this is going to become more and more the norm as we move forward.

[Tog Driver]

On November 11, 2018 at 1:06 AM, Amazonsucks said:

Yeah and compare that to the activities i mentioned. If someone says that to you, you can tell them to piss off online. If you get mixed up with drugs or other IRL drama, pregnancy, crime, fighting, STDs, i think having some asshat on a game tell me to kms is pretty tame. 

 

I mean if someone tells me to kms over a game id laugh at them pretty hard.

True, people online can be ignored, but from what I've seen random strangers are much more likely to be "asshats" online then in real life, go play a online game and see how many people will swear at you, go to a park and see how many people swear at you, but it is of course much easier to get into real trouble in real life then online.

[Amazonsucks]

3 hours ago, TheClueLessMajority said:

True, people online can be ignored, but from what I've seen random strangers are much more likely to be "asshats" online then in real life, go play a online game and see how many people will swear at you, go to a park and see how many people swear at you, but it is of course much easier to get into real trouble in real life then online.

Not me. Im more polite online because everything you say and do is preserved. Although with smartphones and 1984 style surveillance everywhere its hard to be an asshat irl too, which makes me sad.

[Tog Driver]

3 hours ago, Amazonsucks said:

Not me. Im more polite online because everything you say and do is preserved. Although with smartphones and 1984 style surveillance everywhere its hard to be an asshat irl too, which makes me sad.

(As you probably know) Most people are more rude online then in real life because It's hard to punch people through the internet, real life however. . .

 

Also, if I didn't know you meant the book 1984 I would think 1984 style surveillance sounds really cool.

[Tog Driver]

On November 11, 2018 at 7:45 AM, pipnina said:

 "Yeah we know you're 26, but you live under our christian roof and I won't have none of that sexy business going on" <- unacceptable behaviour from a parent.

Why? I can only assume they paid for the house/property or rent, if they don't want random people coming into their house for, reasons, then what's wrong with that? is it that strange that they don't want things they disapprove of going on, on Their property? would you want people to use drugs on your property? (of course, I don't know anything about you, so I can't make a great analogy.)

[Amazonsucks]

19 minutes ago, TheClueLessMajority said:

(As you probably know) Most people are more rude online then in real life because It's hard to punch people through the internet, real life however. . .

 

Also, if I didn't know you meant the book 1984 I would think 1984 style surveillance sounds really cool.

Yeah man guys with awesome clothes on a stakeout in a really cool 80s car with good music 

[Tog Driver]

10 minutes ago, Amazonsucks said:

Yeah man guys with awesome clothes on a stakeout in a really cool 80s car with good music 

Maybe a bug on someone? Some people in a big van with a bunch of tape recorders and stuff?

[This_guy1998]

When I was a kid (I'm 20 now). My parents (mainly my mom) had concerns about video games. The thing is they aren't productive for the most part. My mom's original solution was to get a Wii (she loved Wii bowling and the singing games when we did family game nights when I was younger (she now mainly plays phone games every now and again)). She eventually let me get a 3ds and I eventually built a gaming PC 2 and a half years ago. The thing is though is now as a young adult I only play games on school breaks for the most part (usually involves a benge for 2 or so days)(plan on doing that with Fallout 76, too busy to play it). The reason why is because of habit because my family only played Wii on the weekends when we were free (same rule for me and my sister on using the computer for a while when we were younger). I do use my phone a bit though but if I need to do something else I can.

 

Honestly there is more to life than gaming. I work (on the weekend), tinker with tech (im a IT major and computer hobby helps alot), go to school, life (alot relates to college and other things I do), and go camping (I wish I could do more of this but I am busy. I use to do this 1-2 times a month, now its around 4 times a year). How old are you? My mom didn't remove restrictions completely til I was 14 and had good reasons. Just be thankful you have tech, even if it isn't all that great and you can't play games on them.

 

Personally, while games are fun, that will not get you a job or teach you life skills. Even when I am not productive on the computer (or doing anything else), there are times that I wonder how I could have used it better. 

[MoesNumberOneFan]

On 11/10/2018 at 10:00 AM, pipnina said:

When I was growing up I had as much game time as I wanted so long as my chores and homework were done (homework had to be done first). I probably had 10 hours of gaming a week on average before secondary school, maybe more on holiday weeks?

 

When I was 12 I broke my femur skiing and was obsessed with league of legends at the time, well I ended up in a wheelchair for almost 3 months and I was playing 80+ hours a week. One time played 18 hours straight on a saturday, not a proud time of my life but even now if I want to play something I could easily do 35 hours a week. (14 now) Also I work a part-time job but only get 5-10 hours a week. Also have maintained very good grades through all of this

[FadedCrown]

26 minutes ago, MoesNumberOneFan said:

When I was 12 I broke my femur skiing and was obsessed with league of legends at the time, well I ended up in a wheelchair for almost 3 months and I was playing 80+ hours a week. One time played 18 hours straight on a saturday, not a proud time of my life but even now if I want to play something I could easily do 35 hours a week. (14 now) Also I work a part-time job but only get 5-10 hours a week. Also have maintained very good grades through all of this

At least you had an excuse. If I play video games for longer than 8 hours in a session, I get a headache.

[DumbAsshole32]

.

[GilmourD]

1 hour ago, Kriss ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) said:

Well for one our parents generation didint really have alot of electronics.

@iKingRPG is 13, IIRC. If you're around the same age then it's likely that I'm older than your and his parents (I'm 39) and I sure as heck had a lot of electronics. I got an OG NES when I was 7. I got a PC when I was 8. By the time I was 13 I had an SNES (my brother had a Sega Genesis) and a better PC that I ran a BBS on. Sure, I went out and rode my bike a lot when I was a kid, but... You know what? Mega Man 1 didn't beat itself. My father (who's now 65) beat Metroid before I did and he had an Intellivision II and an Atari 2600 when I was a baby.

 

So, yeah... Electronics. 

[Guest]

My mum and dad were a bit like this and the my were quite right. Spent way too much time on the computer playing games. Sure I was one of the best RTS players in the country, but that doesn’t mean a thing. 

 

It is far more satisfying to get a decent grade now, not into video games anymore. Priorities shift when you grow up, and I really wished that I dropped them a long time ago. 

 

The truth is the world is changing at a rediculous pace, but I’ll put it like this: you just can’t live around a video game and live moves fast. I know it seems to stupid right now, but you’ll grow up a lot quicker than you think, and if you regret not having more time for life , what does that mean for your future?

[iKingRPG]

16 hours ago, GilmourD said:

@iKingRPG is 13, IIRC. If you're around the same age then it's likely that I'm older than your and his parents (I'm 39) and I sure as heck had a lot of electronics. I got an OG NES when I was 7. I got a PC when I was 8. By the time I was 13 I had an SNES (my brother had a Sega Genesis) and a better PC that I ran a BBS on. Sure, I went out and rode my bike a lot when I was a kid, but... You know what? Mega Man 1 didn't beat itself. My father (who's now 65) beat Metroid before I did and he had an Intellivision II and an Atari 2600 when I was a baby.

 

So, yeah... Electronics. 

Well I know my mom had a Nintendo for a couple years and my dad grew up in another country and I don't think he had a computer until he was around 18-20 (just guessing). My mom also hates MODERN games more than what she grew up with. I like the kinds of games she grew up with too. I guess most of my life I had access to games since I used to play PC games since I was about 4-5. I love video games, but I am not addicted to them. The whole point of this forum was to find other people who's parents are like this. Of course I love games, I know playing a lot can waste time, which is why I have other hobbies too.