My mom hit my car while backing out, should I ask her to pay for the damages?

[Monkey Dust]

Personally I think it come down to can your mum afford to repair your car without financial hardship? If it will leave her unable to put food on the table, insisting she pay would be a douche bag move. If she's quite comfortable on the money front, it would be reasonable for her to pay. It sounds like it's just cosmetic damage, so you could wait for a bumper in the right colour second hand, or it might be repairable, though body work is expensive.

 

Above all, with close family keep it civil. When things get complicated with family, you're stuck with it until you either resolve it, or one of you dies.

[Unhelpful]

9 minutes ago, Monkey Dust said:

Personally I think it come down to can your mum afford to repair your car without financial hardship? If it will leave her unable to put food on the table, insisting she pay would be a douche bag move. If she's quite comfortable on the money front, it would be reasonable for her to pay. It sounds like it's just cosmetic damage, so you could wait for a bumper in the right colour second hand, or it might be repairable, though body work is expensive.

 

Above all, with close family keep it civil. When things get complicated with family, you're stuck with it until you either resolve it, or one of you dies.

Hey look, somebody sensible! 

 

OP it fully depends on your mother's financial situation.

[Midnitewarrior4]

18 hours ago, maulemall said:

If you are old enough to drive you are old enough to fix it.

Tell your Mother about it but since you don't pay any bills you need to be respectful and defer to what ever judgement she makes.

... so you your driving and some idiot decides to rear end you and screws up the whole rear end of the car then he should say no problem bruh i got it dont worry, im old enough to drive so its all on me to fix it . your logic makes absolutely no sense your basically saying if your old enough to drive then you automatically become at fault for anything that happens to your car...

[Midnitewarrior4]

17 hours ago, maulemall said:

My daughter wouldn't say a word she would go to work.

 

so pretty much someone could total your daughters car and she would just say "oh well thats sucks, better work my ass off for another car cause this was definetly my fault, definetly wont make the other guy which is at fault pay for it" ? like thats the dumbest thing ive ever heard, if its your fault i get it suck it up and fix it but if someone backs into your car and says oh well dam right im gonna find a way to make them pay for it, why should i have to pay for someone else`s mistakes ?

[Loleo]

Here's my take on this matter.

Honestly I'm quite surprised that she didn't offer you directly to pay the damages.

Are you in a difficult financial situation? If yes ask her to to pay.

Is she in a difficult financial situation? If yes then don't ask her or more appropriately wait until her situation is better then ask her.

Does it seem like she is really regretful about this matter? If yes then you could talk about a 50/50 solution maybe.

But all in all she is your mother, you should talk about this w/ her and if she realizes that this bothers and troubles you this much will probably help you out if she can. Good luck mate.

[dalomo]

42 minutes ago, DevilishBooster said:

That's cute. 

I have USAF and US Army combatives training and trained in MMA with BJJ, Muay Thai, and kick boxing, and qualified expert on both the M16 and small arms. If he's getting all bent out of shape because people disagree with him over how the OP should proceed with the situation, then I think Mr SEAL needs to chill. He's not down range.

And his profile says USMC, so he ain't a SEAL.

I think they're referring the first part of a famous copy-pasta, not actual facts. 

[DevilishBooster]

2 minutes ago, dalomo said:

I think they're referring the first part of a famous copy-pasta, not actual facts. 

A famous... what? 

I realize that I'm not hip and down with all the cool kids these days, but I have no clue WTF "copy-pasta" means.....

(Be gentle! *wince*)

[dalomo]

1 minute ago, DevilishBooster said:

A famous... what? 

I realize that I'm not hip and down with all the cool kids these days, but I have no clue WTF "copy-pasta" means.....

(Be gentle! *wince*)

Oh my bad, haha. It's this really long, multiple paragraph wall of text (not sure where it came from or originally was posted, 4chan or reddit I think)  that's basically a "navy seal" who brags about how many kills he has and how tough he is, and how he's gonna track you (whoever he was replying to in the first place) down and beat the crap out of you or shoot you or something. 

 

People copy+paste that really long wall of text sometimes when they want to mock someone who's acting tough/better than other people. It's pretty funny from time to time.

 

Look up "navy seals copypasta" if you want to read it.

Oh, and a "copypasta" is basically a piece of text that gets copied and pasted around a bunch, usually for comical effect.

[Nexxus]

17 hours ago, maulemall said:

I'll tell you like I tell my daughter who is your age, You can whine or you can fix. Your choice but the fix thing is going to happen regardless, And whining is only going to piss me off.

She doesn't whine,We get things done and we do whatever she wants in our free time.

NObody likes a whiner

Your logic is nothing short of astonishing. 

9 minutes ago, patskey said:

hi to all members..

 

WRong thread bud.

[DevilishBooster]

3 hours ago, dalomo said:

Oh my bad, haha. It's this really long, multiple paragraph wall of text (not sure where it came from or originally was posted, 4chan or reddit I think)  that's basically a "navy seal" who brags about how many kills he has and how tough he is, and how he's gonna track you (whoever he was replying to in the first place) down and beat the crap out of you or shoot you or something. 

 

People copy+paste that really long wall of text sometimes when they want to mock someone who's acting tough/better than other people. It's pretty funny from time to time.

 

Look up "navy seals copypasta" if you want to read it.

Oh, and a "copypasta" is basically a piece of text that gets copied and pasted around a bunch, usually for comical effect.

 

2 hours ago, valdyrgramr said:

This

LMAO!! That's hilarious! 

[Rekojylekilun]

I got some colored crayons if you need. 5.99$

[Okjoek]

If it's just minor damage to cosmetics like dents or scratches then no. If it's serious damage that actually prevents you from driving properly then yes maybe.

 

I couldn't care less what a car looks like personally as long as it gets me from point a to point b.

[TheBestUserName]

This is a pretty long thread, and I gave up trying to read it all... so I don't know if there was a resolution yet. 

But what I would have done was just tell my mom that she damaged my car to see how she responds and to give her the opportunity to make an offer for the repair.  

 

If she makes no offer, I would ask her to pay half.  The tactic would be in the phrasing and tone of voice. I wouldn't say, "I'd like you to pay for half of it" or something like that.  That's a bit finger-pointing and aggro.  I'd make it a team effort and ask for it, "Can we go halves on the bill?"  

 

If she declines, depending on the pace of the conversation, I *might* ask why. 

 

But in the end, you're 16 with a 6 year old car that has cosmetic damage.  I think you should just live with it the way it is. I'm almost 37 with an 8 year old car that has cosmetic damage on the rear bumper. I'm in no hurry to get it repaired.

 

[EthanTheFrogMan]

2 minutes ago, TheBestUserName said:

This is a pretty long thread, and I gave up trying to read it all... so I don't know if there was a resolution yet. 

But what I would have done was just tell my mom that she damaged my car to see how she responds and to give her the opportunity to make an offer for the repair.  

 

If she makes no offer, I would ask her to pay half.  The tactic would be in the phrasing and tone of voice. I wouldn't say, "I'd like you to pay for half of it" or something like that.  That's a bit finger-pointing and aggro.  I'd make it a team effort and ask for it, "Can we go halves on the bill?"  

 

If she declines, depending on the pace of the conversation, I *might* ask why. 

 

But in the end, you're 16 with a 6 year old car that has cosmetic damage.  I think you should just live with it the way it is. I'm almost 37 with an 8 year old car that has cosmetic damage on the rear bumper. I'm in no hurry to get it repaired.

its true its cosmetic, but I spoke with a body shop owner who is a friend of mine, and he and I are both worried the crack in the bumper is going to spread with no support, and a drifters stitch is not a possibility as it would have to be bonded to metal. The problem is that half of the bumper has a possibility of breaking off in the long run, at which time I will have to end up replacing it.

 

[TheBestUserName]

4 hours ago, valdyrgramr said:

Gorrila Warfare...the best part.  

You mean guerrilla warfare?  

 

Apes battling would sure be a great thing to see, though. Haha

[PokeCatz]

On 6/8/2016 at 6:33 PM, EthanTheFrogMan said:

I have, and none of them have ANY parts for 2009-12 corollas

 

I also checked ebay and I can get one, but it will only about $20 less than a new one painted. 

We don't have many junk yards here, and getting the right color will be difficult too

Just get a different color. It looks ghetto and no one will steal your car.

[TheBestUserName]

2 minutes ago, EthanTheFrogMan said:

its true its cosmetic, but I spoke with a body shop owner who is a friend of mine, and he and I are both worried the crack in the bumper is going to spread with no support, and a drifters stitch is not a possibility as it would have to be bonded to metal. The problem is that half of the bumper has a possibility of breaking off in the long run, at which time I will have to end up replacing it.

 

Pic?

[EthanTheFrogMan]

1 minute ago, TheBestUserName said:

Pic?

ill get one on in a bit

[benny_r_t_2]

I've not read any other posts in this thread... but to answer the question in the title.  You shouldn't have to ask.  Any "normal" person (doesn't matter if mom, dad or complete stranger), it is covered by insurance litigation.  Get her license plate number and insurance info.     Then wait  a few months for your insurance premiums to triple and quadruple.   Welcome to life and the real world, a sad mess.

 

But really, if you require to ask a computer forum what to do in this situation, you are already kindof in a mess.  Mom should have simply said "awww son, I'm sorry. I love you.  Popo, take care of it."

[Nuluvius]

2 hours ago, TheBestUserName said:

You mean guerrilla warfare?  

 

Apes battling would sure be a great thing to see, though. Haha

[TheMcSame]

OP:

 

Yes... Yes you should. In fact, she's committed several offences. Reckless (or careless) driving, damage to private property, and hit-and-run.

 

The more you let her get away with it, the more she'll do it, because she hasn't got a reason to improve, she's not being punished for bad driving.