How a geek should ask a sporty girl out......

[TiresomeToe933]

Ok ok ok.

 

Yeah, I have decided not to ask. Ok? I'm done. Gonna try again next year. 1GF per year!

[Guest]

2 hours ago, TiresomeToe933 said:

Ok ok ok.

 

Yeah, I have decided not to ask. Ok? I'm done. Gonna try again next year. 1GF per year!

Nah just do it.

[spwath]

4 hours ago, TiresomeToe933 said:

Ok ok ok.

 

Yeah, I have decided not to ask. Ok? I'm done. Gonna try again next year. 1GF per year!

Next year?

You just have to do it.

I know that isn't helpful at all, as I was in the same situation once. I made my friends force me to do it, and I went to prom with some girl. Worked out great.

There was another story that didn't go too well but I won't get into that...

[BlueChinchillaEatingDorito]

57 minutes ago, spwath said:

Next year?

You just have to do it.

I know that isn't helpful at all, as I was in the same situation once. I made my friends force me to do it, and I went to prom with some girl. Worked out great.

There was another story that didn't go too well but I won't get into that...

Well I'm 2 years in and still haven't asked her out. #winning. 

[Praxis727]

Sporty, Nerdy, Brainy, creative, Popular ect...  Doesn't matter what they are into fella.  Girls are girls who are people.  Don't "ask her out".  Ask her to go do something sometime.  There is no pressure because you need to approach with no expectation.  You don't need to change who you are to include yourself in her interests.  If she has a game or a race or whatever she does ask her when the next one is.  Tell her you think to would be fun to come cheer her on.  While you are there maybe you buy her a water and listen to her thoughts on how it is going.  Tell her she is doing great and crack a joke about how you wouldn't make it 2 block before being out of breath (personal go to for a laugh out of the wife who frequently does atheltic stuff.) 

              Sharing interest and listening.  Be funny and be yourself.  None of it is a lie because you are interested in her.  It isn't changing learning more about what she does and most women love support.  I am not saying something like that wins you the girl but damned right it puts you on the field.  Do not bring up dating or BF and GF.  Instead tell her about something you are doing and ask if she wanted to come see your crazy hobbies or family function. 

 

         Make it public and be attentive.  Girls dont want to go to the movies with a guy or sit in and watch netflix because it is boring.  They would prefer walks or studying together or participating in something fun.  She needs to learn who you are too.  Not the you she thinks she know or you think she knows but the you who thinks you deserve a girl like her.  That guy is adventurous and willing to try new things.

 

         Teasing her is just as important as joking at your expense.  No one is on a pedestal and is it ever awkward when people put them there.  If you are holding her in regard like she never has done anything wrong and you will love her always and forgive her for anything then you are only interested in your idea of her.  People like to be taken off guard playfully.  So I am clear don't tell her she's stupid if she gets something wrong or doesn't understand something being discussed  say something sarcastic funny/goofy so she knows you are joking.I did but well I'm me lol.  If she makes a comment about being sweaty and gross say something like good thing we arent dating cuz I dont know if I could hug someone that sweaty.*big smile and a laugh.  That is how I am I am not saying you have to be like that but it shows confidence and it shows that you think she is a real person.  We all have our own style of doing things.  

 

           Don't be blunt and desperate.  dont just straight out ask where she is going to be cuz you want to watch her.  There needs to be some common buildup like studies or conversational startup to warm up the situation.  A simple hello or how are you doing in the morning.  Asking her what she got for what answer and how or what she thought of a topic in an assignment.  Slip in some personal experiences relating after a few weeks of being more of a natural thing you guys talk mention the wanting to watch a game.  

 

           At the end of this all you have managed to do is establish a present and current friendship and created an up to date and valid interaction routine....  otherwise made a friend.  Friend zone happens to the people follow quietly.  Dont be available be around.  Around enough that she has her own time.  But not enough where you involve yourself in her other routines.  Like you shouldn't crash things when she is hanging out with her peoples.  Read the room a guy needs some mystery and a girl has her secrets.   

 

          When you do ask her out.  She isn't going to laugh in your face and if she does it is not worth it anyways.  Worse she can do is say no.  That is just square one and knowing where you stand.  If she does say yes then awesome.  If she says know then you come back with something like it's all good, I just like hanging out with you I just thought it would be fun.  She will say something like sorry ect.  or she might change her mind and say you know what why not.   Either way let her know it was a passing thought and give a few days space.  Ask her her thoughts on a topic in a few days and act like you are happy you are friends cuz women love guys that don't lose their composure.  Someday she might think differently.  If not then then Mrs. Toe is still waiting out there.

           Sorry for the novel.  I just read a whole bunch of stuff that was off base in previous posts.  If I condensed it all down it would be something like dont treat her like a woman or a goddess.  Treat her like her.  Don't hang a lifetime of emotional despair on it because it''s not fair to either of you .  Be you and show her the best version of you.  Have your own goals and focus and let her have hers.  At the end of it all u can really still be friends but only if you keep your calm.  No isn't the end of the world it's the start of the next chapter.  Good luck!!!!!    Oh yeah, dont over think it or overthink about it.  She might say yes.  That means don't plan for a no plan for what if she actually says yes.  then what are you going to do haha.  My wife has me running around all the time ....not sure it's what I signed up for but she is great so I do it.

[LAwLz]

20 hours ago, TiresomeToe933 said:

Ok ok ok.

 

Yeah, I have decided not to ask. Ok? I'm done. Gonna try again next year. 1GF per year!

No!

Stop being a wimp. Grow some balls and ask her for a coffee or something this coming weekend.

 

Seriously, what is the worst that can happen? That she says no?

Wanna know what's worse than a rejection? Forever wondering if they would have answered yes or no.

[mr moose]

I don't know if you have worked it out yet or not, but OP has some self esteem issues that are not going to be overcome with words of encouragement (no matter how good or well intentioned).  That's not how it works.  The only way he will be able to ask her out is when he experiences success to the point that his self confidence is Strong enough to deal with rejection.  Perceived (not actual) rejection is a very strong evolutionary trait that protects us, you can't just wish it away it takes time and counseling. 

 

Seriously OP, just watch the videos and be positive about yourself.

[TiresomeToe933]

2 hours ago, mr moose said:

I don't know if you have worked it out yet or not, but OP has some self esteem issues that are not going to be overcome with words of encouragement (no matter how good or well intentioned).  That's not how it works.  The only way he will be able to ask her out is when he experiences success to the point that his self confidence is Strong enough to deal with rejection.  Perceived (not actual) rejection is a very strong evolutionary trait that protects us, you can't just wish it away it takes time and counseling. 

 

Seriously OP, just watch the videos and be positive about yourself.

Thank You! someone has been noticing things!

 

No but seriously.... someone talked about girls having this timeframe thing where they are more willing. someone said that in this thread.

 

If I'm gonna ask, probably not now. Cause I can very obviously see the timeframe of when she is willing.

 

My issue is not the thought of rejection, its approaching her and asking... plus she is always with her friends so... That makes it harder.

 

Also, I think I have passed the 1 or 2 month timeframe of when she is especially interested.....

 

Thanks!

[Praxis727]

No problem saying hi on the way by.  Just dont interrupt her and her friends and be friendly.  goes a long way.  If one of them looks like she has a bunch of stuff to carry or errends to run offer a few minutes of your time. 

[TiresomeToe933]

Ok Ok,

 

So... do u guys have any first time asking out mistakes?

 

That could help.....

 

[LAwLz]

On 6/21/2018 at 1:52 AM, TiresomeToe933 said:

No but seriously.... someone talked about girls having this timeframe thing where they are more willing. someone said that in this thread.

More willing to... what exactly?

If you're talking about willing to have sex then yes. It's not uncommon to get hornier just before, or during your period. Some girls will feel kind of gross on their periods though, so it really depends on who you're asking. It's worth noting that it it's a terrible idea to try and guess and align your confession with her menstrual cycle, because at the start of periods there can be some pretty dramatic mood swings, you can feel very tired and sluggish and stuff like that.

 

If you're talking about going on dates then it's more or less the same for ~25 days of the month.

It will be best to ask her out when she is in a good mood. Don't do it around her friends either. Do it when you two are alone. It will be easier for both you and her.

 

 

On 6/21/2018 at 1:52 AM, TiresomeToe933 said:

My issue is not the thought of rejection, its approaching her and asking... plus she is always with her friends so... That makes it harder.

Do you have her number or facebook or something? I don't think there is anything wrong with asking her out over text.

 

 

 

9 hours ago, TiresomeToe933 said:

So... do u guys have any first time asking out mistakes?

I have a few tips that can apply to any conversation, not just when asking someone on a date.

1) When complimenting someone, compliment them on something they have done rather than what they have. Hearing "you're so pretty" is boring because if you are pretty, you've heard that over and over already. She is into sports right? If she did well in some sporting event recently compliment her on that. It will make her feel a lot more special than the generic compliment.

 

 

2) If you're having difficulty keeping a conversation going, try and limit the amount of closed questions you're asking, and aim for open questions. What I mean by that is, do not give her questions that can be answered with a yes or no.

In general, closed questions are those containing these words:

• Does
• Did
• Has
• Can
• Is
• Was

Open question (the ones you want to use) are those containing these words:

• Where
• Why
• Who
• What
• Which
• How

 

By asking questions that need several words to answer, the conversation goes on for longer and you will often find hooks into follow-up questions.

 

Example of closed question:

-Did you have fun in school today?

-Yes

And the conversation ended.

 

Example of open question:

-What was the best part of school today?

-It was probably P.E.

-Oh really? How come..

...

The conversation goes on.

 

 

3) Have an open body language.

It's natural to close up when you're nervous, but you will seem much more confident and less intimidating if you have your hands visible, and look at the person you're speaking with rather than away from them. It can be small things, like not covering your mouth (when you for example lean against your hand).

Try and keep your arms a bit away from your body too. It is very common to push your arms against your rib cage when nervous, and it really shines "insecure". You can try it yourself right now if you want. Hold your arms against the side of your body, and you end up with little stumpy "t-rex arms". Move them away from your body and you appear more open and inviting.

[Starelementpoke]

On 6/19/2018 at 9:03 AM, TiresomeToe933 said:

 

Just ask if she wants to go see a movie when a popular one drops. 

[Guest]

Well you can start by not referring to yourself as a "nerd or geek". Gaming and technology are not a niche thing like the were in the 80's, everyones into it today. Secondly, have some confidence but not arrogance....this is a common mistake so many guys make. Don't be afraid to suggest where you want to go or what you want to do.

 

Just be upfront, ask her out (not by text!). Do something fun, go bowling, play minigolf, whatever, just make it a fun date not a job interview. And remember, she's not the only girl on planet earth. So don't go into this thinking ..."omg I can't screw up". You need a level of being nice but not TOO nice, don't drown her with compliments. Talk about school, your interests, her interests. This is why I suggested something that involves "activity", so you aren't there just asking 20 questions. When she talks, take a GENUINE interest in what she says.

 

Just go up to her and say " Hey (insert name here) can I t a ke you out for a coffee, minigolf whatever, I know a great place that makes an awesome coffee". Btw, why do you want to go out with her?

 

Oh and the biggest suggestion...DON'T OVERTHINK IT! If either of you aren't feeling the vibe then don't try to push it or force it why asking 20questions. Judt chill out, say it was nice catching up, maybe we'll do it again some other time. Just be relaxed you know.

[Guest]

A lot of these answers are contradictive. Just don’t overthink it. She likes you for you, not for a pick up line or Mr. Love Guru. 

 

Its easier said than done but you know people are people. You aren’t human if you don’t get a butterfly tummy once in a while. It’s alright to feel nervous. Don’t read some stupid stuff on the internet to pick up chicks. Or even worse, listen to us.

[kokakolia]

Why don’t you just ask people out and start going on dates? 

 

Bad dates are fine because usually nothing interesting happens. It’s time to make mistakes and learn. 

[PlayStation 2]

1. Don't go in expecting to plow pussy on first sight. 

2. Get to actually know her before actually asking her out.

3. Be realistic with yourself. This one's very important and hard for many. 

[wasab]

On 6/20/2018 at 4:34 PM, LAwLz said:

No!

Stop being a wimp. Grow some balls and ask her for a coffee or something this coming weekend.

 

Seriously, what is the worst that can happen? That she says no?

Wanna know what's worse than a rejection? Forever wondering if they would have answered yes or no.

true true, and women love men with confidence, not whimps, am i right ladies? 

[Andreas Lilja]

Is "geek" still even a style? Most of what they did is now super mainstream. 

[TiresomeToe933]

On 24/06/2018 at 1:14 AM, LAwLz said:

(INSERT SHIT HE SAID)

ok ok, I have her no. what do I say?

 

@LAwLz.

[LAwLz]

22 minutes ago, TiresomeToe933 said:

ok ok, I have her no. what do I say?

 

@LAwLz.

She said no? 

Damn, that's rough man. Sadly it's not much you can do. You gave it a shot and things did not go as you hoped. 

 

But remember that you at least know the answer now, and the result is the same as if you hadn't asked. 

[DeLorian]

[TiresomeToe933]

13 hours ago, LAwLz said:

She said no? 

Damn, that's rough man. Sadly it's not much you can do. You gave it a shot and things did not go as you hoped. 

 

But remember that you at least know the answer now, and the result is the same as if you hadn't asked. 

Ok. Well. Least I tried......