Best Computer-Based puns and jokes!

[Stardar1]

Here's mine:

 

Roses are red

My screen is blue

and I'm sitting here thinking

What the **** did i do?

 

 

what do you guys have?

[AverageHardware]

You turn my floppy drive into a hard drive? 

[sissj]

Hey babe, you sittin' on dat f5 key?

 

cause' yo ass is refreshing

 

badum tss!

[PlayStation 2]

Hey babe, you sittin' on dat f5 key?

 

cause' yo ass is refreshing

 

badum tss!

Hey dude are you a software update

because not right now

[Samfisher]

A programmer is going to the grocery store and his wife tells him, "Buy a gallon of milk, and if there are eggs, buy a dozen." So the programmer goes, buys everything, and drives back to his house. Upon arrival, his wife angrily asks him, "Why did you get 13 gallons of milk?" The programmer says, "There were eggs!"

[Stardar1]

A programmer is going to the grocery store and his wife tells him, "Buy a gallon of milk, and if there are eggs, buy a dozen." So the programmer goes, buys everything, and drives back to his house. Upon arrival, his wife angrily asks him, "Why did you get 13 gallons of milk?" The programmer says, "There were eggs!"

12*

[Stardar1]

[Samfisher]

12*

13, cos the first gallon of milk is not subject to the "if/else" condition. "And if" would mean in addition to in that sentence

[Stardar1]

13, cos the first gallon of milk is not subject to the "if/else" condition.

hmmm, debatable

 

as it is written, it looks to me as if the command is being written

 

if(eggs)

{

   for(int i = 0; i<=12;i++)

   {

      milk();

   }

}

else milk();

[werto165]

I dropped my PC on my foot, it bloody MHz. 

[Stardar1]

I dropped my PC on my foot, it bloody MHz. 

man, that bytes

[Stardar1]

also:

 

[Penny5837]

You can always put a Trojan on my hard drive

[Samfisher]

hmmm, debatable

 

as it is written, it looks to me as if the command is being written

 

if(eggs)

{

   for(int i = 0; i<=12;i++)

   {

      milk();

   }

}

else milk();

 

 

It would be more like this :

public int getNumberOfMilkToBuy(bool storeHasEggs){    int milkToBuy = 1;    if(storeHasEggs)        milkToBuy += 12;    return milkToBuy;}

[Silverfields]

What do you say to someone when their computer breaks?

Another one bytes the dust!

[iamdarkyoshi]

AMDs are red, Intels are blue, this thread is pointless, and will be locked with mod glue.

 

lel

[Stardar1]

 

It would be more like this :

public int getNumberOfMilkToBuy(bool storeHasEggs){    int milkToBuy = 1;    if(storeHasEggs)        milkToBuy += 12;    return milkToBuy;}

public int getNumberOfMilkToBuy(bool storeHasEggs)

{

   int milkToBuy = 1;

   if(storeHasEggs)

   {

      milkToBuy = 12;

   }

   return milkToBuy;

}

 

^how i interpreted it (also, formatting pls)

and i also like C#

[tbroadwater2010]

hmmm, debatable

 

as it is written, it looks to me as if the command is being written

 

if(eggs)

{

   for(int i = 0; i<=12;i++)

   {

      milk();

   }

}

else milk();

that moment when you debate the amount of fictional gallons of milk a fictional programmer purchased because your not sure how the "code" was written ^^

[Stardar1]

AMDs are red, Intels are blue, this thread is pointless, and will be locked with mod glue.

 

lel

NVidias are green, and i disagree

[paps511]

Not quite computer, but mathy

 

This Limerick

( (12 + 144 + 20 + 3 Sqrt[4]) / 7 ) + 5*11 = 9² + 0 .

 

A dozen, a gross, and a score, 
plus three times the square root of four, 
divided by seven, 
plus five times eleven, 
is nine squared and not a bit more. 

[iamdarkyoshi]

NVidias are green, and i disagree

I felt like making a funny. But I think there is already a thread for this, too lazy to find it

[Samfisher]

 

public int getNumberOfMilkToBuy(bool storeHasEggs)

{

   int milkToBuy = 1;

   if(storeHasEggs)

   {

      milkToBuy = 12;

   }

   return milkToBuy;

}

 

^how i interpreted it (also, formatting pls)

and i also like C#

 

But the sentence clearly says "And", which means in addition to the first gallon Java is all I can remember from college, I'm so bad at it right now lol.

 

 

 

 

Not quite computer, but mathy

 

This Limerick

Only limerick I know

 

[Stardar1]

Not quite computer, but mathy

 

This Limerick

( (12 + 144 + 20 + 3 Sqrt[4]) / 7 ) + 5*11 = 9² + 0 .

 

A dozen, a gross, and a score, 

plus three times the square root of four, 

divided by seven, 

plus five times eleven, 

is nine squared and not a bit more. 

ah yes, i have seen this before as well, but, we all know that math puns are the first sine of madness

[Stardar1]

But the sentence clearly says "And", which means in addition to the first gallon Java is all I can remember from college, I'm so bad at it right now lol.

if that was Java, it would be boolean storeHasEggs

[Guest]

Hey babe, are you made by AMD? 'cause you're so hot right now.