Parents Wont Let Me Spend My Own Money

[Bruce Clark Wayne]

so i wanted to buy a pair of 100 dollar headphones for gaming, listening to music and general casual use but when i asked my mom for permission (had to, no choice since i needed her credit card) she said i cant be spending 100 dollars on headphones which i then replied saying that 100 dollars isn't even that expensive for a headphone of this caliber but she disagreed anyway and said that ill only be able to spend this amount when im actually working. Is that fair? also i feel like older people don't appreciate tech as much and take it for granted, that's why they don't see the value in most things tech related.

[Rishum]

3 minutes ago, Bruce Clark Wayne said:

so i wanted to buy a pair of 100 dollar headphones for gaming, listening to music and general casual use but when i asked my mom for permission (had to, no choice since i needed her credit card) she said i cant be spending 100 dollars on headphones which i then replied saying that 100 dollars isn't even that expensive for a headphone of this caliber but she disagreed anyway and said that ill only be able to spend this amount when im actually working. Is that fair? also i feel like older people don't appreciate tech as much and take it for granted, that's why they don't see the value in most things tech related.

Are you not old enough for your own debit card? In the UK you can one from 11 years old! 

[DocSwag]

If it's your money you should be able to do what you want with it, assuming of course that you're not blowing it on stupid stuff.

 

My parents let me buy want I want if I pay for it. They may not always understand why I buy it but they still let me buy it with my own money.

 

Your mom probably has good intentions and is trying to keep you from wasting the money but I think she doesn't understand the whole situation.

[19_blackie_73]

I had to beg and beg and beg for even cheaper stuff for like 20 bucks and didnt get it

So dont wine

[dalekphalm]

Just now, Bruce Clark Wayne said:

so i wanted to buy a pair of 100 dollar headphones for gaming, listening to music and general casual use but when i asked my mom for permission (had to, no choice since i needed her credit card) she said i cant be spending 100 dollars on headphones which i then replied saying that 100 dollars isn't even that expensive for a headphone of this caliber but she disagreed anyway and said that ill only be able to spend this amount when im actually working. Is that fair? also i feel like older people don't appreciate tech as much and take it for granted, that's why they don't see the value in most things tech related.

I assume you're pretty young, since your mom mentioned that you can only spend that kind of money once you've got a job.

 

Frankly, as a minor that's probably under the age of 16? Your parents really do make the rules. You could try and convince her to let you spend the money by using calm, rational arguments, without letting emotion take over. But in most cases, parents won't change their minds.

 

Also, I disagree about older people not appreciating technology. Once you're old enough to work, and to have to pay bills (rent/mortgage, utilities, phone/internet, etc), you appreciate the cost of something so much more than a young kid ever could (no offense), because you know how much time and effort it took to EARN the money you spend.

 

Obviously not everyone appreciates money, but on average, the younger folks on this forum are the least appreciative of money and the responsibilities associated with it.

 

Here's my advice:

1. Take that $100 (and any other savings you don't need immediate access to) and make sure you're investing it. That could simply be a Tax Free Savings Account (or your regional equivalent), or it could be a Bond or Index Fund. Speak to your bank about the different options for how much money you have.

2. Wait until you can get a job. You'll earn interest on your $100 in the mean time, meaning that when you have a job, and can make these bigger purchases, you'll have even more money at your disposal.

3. Have restraint: Try not to spend all your money all the time. Make sure you're always saving some money, no matter what.

[JakeNTech]

I understand your frustration but there are three things you should consider:

1-They want to make sure that you are spending your money wisely, so that when you move out and start making money you don't go and blow it all on something ridiculous.

2- They also don't want you to waste your money either on something you you might not like or use. in fairness £75 ish seems like a lot for a pair of headphones. 

3- They might think that the website is dodgey and perhaps they are worried about someone steeling there details and then you item not arriving. 

 

 

[79wjd]

2 minutes ago, dalekphalm said:

That could simply be a Tax Free Savings Account (or your regional equivalent),

That yearly $0.50 profit.

[givingtnt]

8 minutes ago, Bruce Clark Wayne said:

so i wanted to buy a pair of 100 dollar headphones for gaming, listening to music and general casual use but when i asked my mom for permission (had to, no choice since i needed her credit card) she said i cant be spending 100 dollars on headphones which i then replied saying that 100 dollars isn't even that expensive for a headphone of this caliber but she disagreed anyway and said that ill only be able to spend this amount when im actually working. Is that fair? also i feel like older people don't appreciate tech as much and take it for granted, that's why they don't see the value in most things tech related.

do you have a bnk account ?
then you can have a paypal account

link paypal account to bank account and use it to pay.

[Hiya!]

I am in your position only its not my money what i usually does is explain it to them.

But they won't let me buy it just because i want it or like it.

They will let me buy it if i need it which seems pretty unfair since i do want to buy something that i adore.

But i understand what they are thinking they want me to appreciate money and spend it wisely cause they didn't grow on trees they are earned through hard work,sweat and sacrifices.

 

[Oshino Shinobu]

If it's an allowance kind of deal, it's technically not your money, at least, not unless it's in a bank account that's owned by you. Your parents ultimately have control over what they think you should be spending "your" money on as long as you have to go through them to get it. It would be different if you had the money in a bank account and they were stopping you from accessing it. 

 

A lot of tech can seem expensive to anyone that's not interested in a particular field of tech, as pretty much every tech field has a high end market that seems ridiculous to people not interested in it. I know many people, not just older people, that think it's stupid for me to spend £130 on a keyboard and £250 on a pair of headphones. Those same people won't think twice about buying a £1000 iPhone and then pairing it with a £20 set of bluetooth headphones, which I think is more ridiculous than spending £500 on a phone and another £500 on headphones, getting a better experience and saving £20. 

 

Anyway, until you have a job and are actually earning your own money, your parents really make the rules of what you can and can't spend it on. I think most people go through that to some extent, and it's often for the best or at least with good intentions. I've been glad in retrospect at my parents not letting me buy some things when I was younger. 

[Bruce Clark Wayne]

3 minutes ago, dalekphalm said:

I assume you're pretty young, since your mom mentioned that you can only spend that kind of money once you've got a job.

 

Frankly, as a minor that's probably under the age of 16? Your parents really do make the rules. You could try and convince her to let you spend the money by using calm, rational arguments, without letting emotion take over. But in most cases, parents won't change their minds.

 

Also, I disagree about older people not appreciating technology. Once you're old enough to work, and to have to pay bills (rent/mortgage, utilities, phone/internet, etc), you appreciate the cost of something so much more than a young kid ever could (no offense), because you know how much time and effort it took to EARN the money you spend.

 

Obviously not everyone appreciates money, but on average, the younger folks on this forum are the least appreciative of money and the responsibilities associated with it.

 

Here's my advice:

1. Take that $100 (and any other savings you don't need immediate access to) and make sure you're investing it. That could simply be a Tax Free Savings Account (or your regional equivalent), or it could be a Bond or Index Fund. Speak to your bank about the different options for how much money you have.

2. Wait until you can get a job. You'll earn interest on your $100 in the mean time, meaning that when you have a job, and can make these bigger purchases, you'll have even more money at your disposal.

3. Have restraint: Try not to spend all your money all the time. Make sure you're always saving some money, no matter what.

your right, but what i mean was that older people (not like 30 or 40, more like 50-60) dont appreciate the value of tech as much as people who are more knowledgeable in these fields, for example; you and i see the benefits of building a computer that costs 1k but for the general people/older people they really, really cant justify spending 1k on a pc and just think you're plain stupid (unless they've spent that much on tech stuff of course)

[Zando_]

4 minutes ago, givingtnt said:

do you have a bnk account ?
then you can have a paypal account

link paypal account to bank account and use it to pay.

I would highly avoid going behind your parent's back. Even if you used PayPal, it'd still get delivered to you/their address, so they'd know. 

[givingtnt]

Just now, Zando Bob said:

I would highly avoid going behind your parent's back. Even if you used PayPal, it'd still get delivered to you/their address, so they'd know. 

im only providing a solution. 

[Technomancer__]

1 minute ago, Zando Bob said:

I would highly avoid going behind your parent's back. Even if you used PayPal, it'd still get delivered to you/their address, so they'd know. 

agree + they will remember you wanted new headphones and you suddenly got new ones so...

[dalekphalm]

Just now, fixitnow said:

I understand your frustration but there are three things you should consider:

1-They want to make sure that you are spending your money wisely, so that when you move out and start making money you don't go and blow it all on something ridiculous.

2- They also don't want you to waste your money either on something you you might not like or use. in fairness £75 ish seems like a lot for a pair of headphones. 

3- They might think that the website is dodgey and perhaps they are worried about someone steeling there details and then you item not arriving. 

 

 

$100 USD gets you a pretty damn good pair of "starter" high end headphones: Eg: Sennheiser HD 598's are usually $100 to $150 USD. The price of headphones can easily go upwards of $1000 for super high end pairs, but the "high end-yet-still-attainable-by-normal-people" segment is basically: $100 to $300. Anyone spending more than $300 is an audiophile (or has more money than sense).

 

You can get decent headphones under $100, yeah, but until you've experienced that higher quality, you don't even know what you're missing.

 

2 minutes ago, djdwosk97 said:

That yearly $0.50 profit.

Mmmmm that entirely depends on what you're doing with your TFSA. If you're just getting a straight TFSA and letting the interest accrue, sure, most places probably aren't paying more than 0.5 to 1% interest. But you can use a TFSA savings account as an investment account for other investments. I'm currently using mine for an ETF through Wealthsimple (PM me for referral code, shameless promotion), and I've been using it less than a year, and I've already earned approximately 3% return. And that's not bad, since these ETF's are balanced for the long game (years, if not decades, for a very high average return).

 

Besides, an extra 50 cents is better than zero profit.

 

Just gotta watch out for bank fees, etc. Those can really kill any profit if you don't read all the details.

 

1 minute ago, Bruce Clark Wayne said:

your right, but what i mean was that older people (not like 30 or 40, more like 50-60) dont appreciate the value of tech as much as people who are more knowledgeable in these fields, for example; you and i see the benefits of building a computer that costs 1k but for the general people/older people they really, really cant justify spending 1k on a pc and just think you're plain stupid (unless they've spent that much on tech stuff of course)

I think I understand your point a little bit better. You mean how the Baby Boomer generation simply never had access to the kind of technology we do today, so they don't understand the value and impact said technology might have on a day to day basis.

[Astralye]

Since I'm 14 I don't have my own credit card, what I do is I ask them and then give them the money once you have ordered it

[Zando_]

Just now, Astralye said:

Since I'm 14 I don't have my own credit card, what I do is I ask them and then give them the money once you have ordered it

And if they say no then RIP. I'm 18 now, so I can pretty much buy whatever I want, but before I had to ask and would often get a no, depending on how much the thing I wanted cost. But having a job certainly helps convince parents to let you buy stuff. 

[Bruce Clark Wayne]

3 minutes ago, Zando Bob said:

I would highly avoid going behind your parent's back. Even if you used PayPal, it'd still get delivered to you/their address, so they'd know. 

exactly lol

[dalekphalm]

1 minute ago, Astralye said:

Since I'm 14 I don't have my own credit card, what I do is I ask them and then give them the money once you have ordered it

That doesn't always work - in the OP's case, he offered to pay them for the purchase. They don't want him spending that much money.

 

It's going to be difficult for him to overcome that. Though honestly it probably just needs time. They need to see he can be responsible with money, so perhaps he just needs to be older.

[Zando_]

2 minutes ago, Bruce Clark Wayne said:

exactly lol

But if you're really Bruce Wayne and your parents ask you why you did it, you can just say "Because I'm Batman!"

[Oshino Shinobu]

2 minutes ago, Bruce Clark Wayne said:

your right, but what i mean was that older people (not like 30 or 40, more like 50-60) dont appreciate the value of tech as much as people who are more knowledgeable in these fields, for example; you and i see the benefits of building a computer that costs 1k but for the general people/older people they really, really cant justify spending 1k on a pc and just think you're plain stupid (unless they've spent that much on tech stuff of course)

That's not an issue with age (though it can somewhat play a factor), it's about being knowledgeable about tech. Pretty much every market has high end stuff that seems ridiculously expensive to someone out of the know. 

 

My sister thinks I'm mad for spending £1000 on a single graphics card and I think she's mad for spending £1000 on some new gear for her horse despite having 3 of what she's buying already. 

 

I have an issue trying to help my parents with their home network stuff because they don't understand how much some of it costs. They'll spend thousands on Apple products, but then when they ask me to spec out a CCTV system for them, they're shocked when I say it's going to be £600 or more for what they want, when they're thinking it would be about £100. They're not opposed to buying expensive tech and they have done, but for things they're not familiar with, they don't appreciate the price of things. It goes for all ages, not just older people. You probably just notice it more with your parents because they're likely the older people you talk to the most. 

[Oshino Shinobu]

2 minutes ago, Zando Bob said:

But if you're really Bruce Wayne and your parents ask you why you did it, you can just say "Because I'm Batman!"

Or you can wonder why/how Batman's dead parents are talking to him. 

[Technomancer__]

try going to a shop with your mom to show her how good they are in comparison to the cheap ones.

[Zando_]

1 minute ago, Oshino Shinobu said:

Or you can wonder why/how Batman's dead parents are talking to him. 

You know why? Because he's Batman...

[Vantage9]

It would help to know things like how old you are....

 

Ignore the posts trying to get you to explain shit to your mother, that's not gonna go anywhere.  If she's the stubborn type to not listen to reason, that's just the way it is.  Either be prepared to buy shit behind her back, or just let it go til you're on your own.