Jump to content

IT Related Jokes

beanhubbleday

Hey,

 

Couldn't find any related ones so here goes, add your own:

 

What do you call an IT engineer from the hood?

 

Domain (say: D'main) man...

 

Look forward to seeing your contributions..

 

Jack :)

Don't forget to @me / quote me for a reply =]

 

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Link to post
Share on other sites

Dad changed the the printer name to Bob Marley, because its always JAMMIN'.

 

WINDOWS - Will Install Needless Data On Whole System

CPU: Intel Core i5-6600k 4.4GHz | Motherboard: Asus ROG STRIX Z270F Gaming | Cooler: Cryorig H7 | RAM: GSkill Ripjaws V 8GB 2x4 3200 MHz | GPU: MSI GTX 1070 Gaming X | PSU: Seasonic G-550w 80+ Gold Certified, Semi Modular | Storage: 250GB Samsung 850 EVO, 1TB Western Digital Caviar Blue | Case: NZXT S340 Elite (Black/Red) | Monitor: BenQ XL2411 144hz | Keyboard: Corsair STRAFE RGB Cherry MX Silent | Mouse: Corsair M65 Pro RGB

 

I'd like to make a Chemistry joke, but all the good ones ARGON. *nudgenudge *winkwink

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Link to post
Share on other sites

On 10/11/2016 at 7:09 PM, Hackentosher said:

This networking closet. Yes this is real. 

 

Xw7pxGM_700wa_0.gif

CPU: AMD Ryzen 5 5600X | CPU Cooler: Stock AMD Cooler | Motherboard: Asus ROG STRIX B550-F GAMING (WI-FI) | RAM: Corsair Vengeance LPX 16 GB (2 x 8 GB) DDR4-3000 CL16 | GPU: Nvidia GTX 1060 6GB Zotac Mini | Case: K280 Case | PSU: Cooler Master B600 Power supply | SSD: 1TB  | HDDs: 1x 250GB & 1x 1TB WD Blue | Monitors: 24" Acer S240HLBID + 24" Samsung  | OS: Win 10 Pro

 

Audio: Behringer Q802USB Xenyx 8 Input Mixer |  U-PHORIA UMC204HD | Behringer XM8500 Dynamic Cardioid Vocal Microphone | Sound Blaster Audigy Fx PCI-E card.

 

Home Lab:  Lenovo ThinkCenter M82 ESXi 6.7 | Lenovo M93 Tiny Exchange 2019 | TP-LINK TL-SG1024D 24-Port Gigabit | Cisco ASA 5506 firewall  | Cisco Catalyst 3750 Gigabit Switch | Cisco 2960C-LL | HP MicroServer G8 NAS | Custom built SCCM Server.

 

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Link to post
Share on other sites

Here's another!

 

An SQL script enters a bar, walks into two tables and said, can I JOIN you?

 

LOOOOOOL!

CPU: Intel Core i5-6600k 4.4GHz | Motherboard: Asus ROG STRIX Z270F Gaming | Cooler: Cryorig H7 | RAM: GSkill Ripjaws V 8GB 2x4 3200 MHz | GPU: MSI GTX 1070 Gaming X | PSU: Seasonic G-550w 80+ Gold Certified, Semi Modular | Storage: 250GB Samsung 850 EVO, 1TB Western Digital Caviar Blue | Case: NZXT S340 Elite (Black/Red) | Monitor: BenQ XL2411 144hz | Keyboard: Corsair STRAFE RGB Cherry MX Silent | Mouse: Corsair M65 Pro RGB

 

I'd like to make a Chemistry joke, but all the good ones ARGON. *nudgenudge *winkwink

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Link to post
Share on other sites

A programmer was heading to the grocery store. His wife told him, "While you're out, buy some eggs."

 

He never returned.

CPU: Intel Core i5-6600k 4.4GHz | Motherboard: Asus ROG STRIX Z270F Gaming | Cooler: Cryorig H7 | RAM: GSkill Ripjaws V 8GB 2x4 3200 MHz | GPU: MSI GTX 1070 Gaming X | PSU: Seasonic G-550w 80+ Gold Certified, Semi Modular | Storage: 250GB Samsung 850 EVO, 1TB Western Digital Caviar Blue | Case: NZXT S340 Elite (Black/Red) | Monitor: BenQ XL2411 144hz | Keyboard: Corsair STRAFE RGB Cherry MX Silent | Mouse: Corsair M65 Pro RGB

 

I'd like to make a Chemistry joke, but all the good ones ARGON. *nudgenudge *winkwink

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Link to post
Share on other sites

Heres another one I made up myself:

 

"A classic period home"  

127.0.0.1  

"Renovated large family home"  

::1  

 

  ('period' - get it ?   ha ha ha ).

 ( the second one is subtle).

 

Copyright for my T-Shirts.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Link to post
Share on other sites

A programmer's wife asks her husband : 

 

Can you get a loaf of bread from the supermarket ?

If they have eggs , get a dozen .

 

The programmer then comes back with 12 loaves of bread

 

AMD Ryzen R7 1700 (3.8ghz) w/ NH-D14, EVGA RTX 2080 XC (stock), 4*4GB DDR4 3000MT/s RAM, Gigabyte AB350-Gaming-3 MB, CX750M PSU, 1.5TB SDD + 7TB HDD, Phanteks enthoo pro case

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Link to post
Share on other sites

6 hours ago, FRN said:

A programmer was heading to the grocery store. His wife told him, "While you're out, buy some eggs."

 

He never returned.

The version I heard was: 

 

A programmer went to the grocery store, his wife told him : Buy some bread, and if there is egg, buy 2.

Then the programmer bought 2 bread home. 

 

@Coaxialgamer Damn it you are earlier than me. 

If it is not broken, let's fix till it is. 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Link to post
Share on other sites

Now that the Power is out, UPS need's to deliver some of that Stored Power...

 

 

get it ? , because UPS Stands for 2-things 

 

1: Uninterruptible Power Supply

 

2: UPS the delivering service 

You can take a look at all of the Tech that I own and have owned over the years in my About Me section and on my Profile.

 

I'm Swiss and my Mother language is Swiss German of course, I speak the Aargauer dialect. If you want to watch a great video about Swiss German which explains the language and outlines the Basics, then click here.

 

If I could just play Videogames and consume Cool Content all day long for the rest of my life, then that would be sick.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Link to post
Share on other sites

ever heard of a band called "the 1023 megabytes" ???

 

their music is awesome but they never had a gig

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Link to post
Share on other sites

6 minutes ago, KenjiUmino said:

ever heard of a band called "the 1023 megabytes" ???

 

their music is awesome but they never had a gig

These I.T jokes are so bad they are good!  Good joke! 

29 minutes ago, Fooshi said:

tcp_joke.jpg

I love this one!  Gonna have to show this to my networking teacher, happens to be my next class ;)

11 hours ago, Coaxialgamer said:

A programmer's wife asks her husband : 

 

Can you get a loaf of bread from the supermarket ?

If they have eggs , get a dozen .

 

The programmer then comes back with 12 loaves of bread

 

This is one of those jokes everyone has heard or seen at least once, still a good joke just a little stale. 

12 hours ago, Nuluvius said:

Did you hear the one about UDP?

 

You'll either get it or you won't...

LOOOOOOOOOOOOOL  This is a fantastic joke!  

13 hours ago, Rohime said:

I've got a really good IT related joke.   

 

Its so funny, I love it:

 

I.B.M.

 

Enough said.

What's funny about IBM though? I 

14 hours ago, FRN said:

A programmer was heading to the grocery store. His wife told him, "While you're out, buy some eggs."

 

He never returned.

This is a good joke too!  Or you could also say he returned with 0, but that wouldn't entirely make sense.  This is a good joke on it's own! 

14 hours ago, FRN said:

Here's another!

 

An SQL script enters a bar, walks into two tables and said, can I JOIN you?

 

LOOOOOOL!

Cool. 

On 10/12/2016 at 1:28 PM, Mug said:

What did the computer do for lunch?

It went out for a byte

 

dad jokes ftw

I don't know why they are called dad jokes?  I like dad jokes and I'm not a dad! 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Link to post
Share on other sites

1 hour ago, Mike_The_B0ss said:

These I.T jokes are so bad they are good!  Good joke! 

They're good one bit.

CPU: Intel Core i5-6600k 4.4GHz | Motherboard: Asus ROG STRIX Z270F Gaming | Cooler: Cryorig H7 | RAM: GSkill Ripjaws V 8GB 2x4 3200 MHz | GPU: MSI GTX 1070 Gaming X | PSU: Seasonic G-550w 80+ Gold Certified, Semi Modular | Storage: 250GB Samsung 850 EVO, 1TB Western Digital Caviar Blue | Case: NZXT S340 Elite (Black/Red) | Monitor: BenQ XL2411 144hz | Keyboard: Corsair STRAFE RGB Cherry MX Silent | Mouse: Corsair M65 Pro RGB

 

I'd like to make a Chemistry joke, but all the good ones ARGON. *nudgenudge *winkwink

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Link to post
Share on other sites

Here's a good IT joke.

 

 

INTERNET EXPLORER

 

 

 

Why did the programmer left his job? He didn't get ARRAYS (pun on "a raise", or "salary raise" and arrays)

 

Why did the girl left his java programmer boyfriend? She's tired of being treated as an object.

CPU: Intel Core i5-6600k 4.4GHz | Motherboard: Asus ROG STRIX Z270F Gaming | Cooler: Cryorig H7 | RAM: GSkill Ripjaws V 8GB 2x4 3200 MHz | GPU: MSI GTX 1070 Gaming X | PSU: Seasonic G-550w 80+ Gold Certified, Semi Modular | Storage: 250GB Samsung 850 EVO, 1TB Western Digital Caviar Blue | Case: NZXT S340 Elite (Black/Red) | Monitor: BenQ XL2411 144hz | Keyboard: Corsair STRAFE RGB Cherry MX Silent | Mouse: Corsair M65 Pro RGB

 

I'd like to make a Chemistry joke, but all the good ones ARGON. *nudgenudge *winkwink

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Link to post
Share on other sites

7 minutes ago, FRN said:

They're good one bit.

You ruined it, sorry but that joke sucked. 

5 minutes ago, FRN said:

Here's a good IT joke.

 

 

INTERNET EXPLORER

That joke sucked too. Sorry. 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Link to post
Share on other sites

1 hour ago, Mike_The_B0ss said:

This is a good joke too!  Or you could also say he returned with 0, but that wouldn't entirely make sense.  This is a good joke on it's own! 

Can I also tell you that their family went broke? Go figure.

CPU: Intel Core i5-6600k 4.4GHz | Motherboard: Asus ROG STRIX Z270F Gaming | Cooler: Cryorig H7 | RAM: GSkill Ripjaws V 8GB 2x4 3200 MHz | GPU: MSI GTX 1070 Gaming X | PSU: Seasonic G-550w 80+ Gold Certified, Semi Modular | Storage: 250GB Samsung 850 EVO, 1TB Western Digital Caviar Blue | Case: NZXT S340 Elite (Black/Red) | Monitor: BenQ XL2411 144hz | Keyboard: Corsair STRAFE RGB Cherry MX Silent | Mouse: Corsair M65 Pro RGB

 

I'd like to make a Chemistry joke, but all the good ones ARGON. *nudgenudge *winkwink

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Link to post
Share on other sites

58 minutes ago, FRN said:

Here's a good IT joke.

 

 

INTERNET EXPLORER

 

 

 

Why did the programmer left his job? He didn't get ARRAYS (pun on "a raise", or "salary raise" and arrays)

 

Why did the girl left his java programmer boyfriend? She's tired of being treated as an object.

lol so true

My PCPartPicker - 1st Build

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Link to post
Share on other sites

have you heard about video games? 

RyzenAir : AMD R5 3600 | AsRock AB350M Pro4 | 32gb Aegis DDR4 3000 | GTX 1070 FE | Fractal Design Node 804
RyzenITX : Ryzen 7 1700 | GA-AB350N-Gaming WIFI | 16gb DDR4 2666 | GTX 1060 | Cougar QBX 

 

PSU Tier list

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Link to post
Share on other sites

11 hours ago, Mike_The_B0ss said:

What's funny about IBM though?

Obviously you have never been a customer trying to get them to deliver a quality outcome on a mega sized project ... 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Link to post
Share on other sites

2 hours ago, Rohime said:

Obviously you have never been a customer trying to get them to deliver a quality outcome on a mega sized project ... 

I don't know what you mean by a "mega sized project"  If it is a startup, of course you are going to have problems because it's a pain to get any services (I've had experience there).  But if you mean something like an already existing company, I know Wells Fargo dropped DB2 about 2 years ago, which could have been caused by bad support.  

 

But I also know a product manager who also happens to work on the DB2 software, he is a very good software engineer and deals with lots of customers, so I trust him that DB2 is good software.  

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

×