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FireFox
By FireFox
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Yo momma's so fat, that when she stopped to stand in front of the TV i missed 2 episodes.

 

I like those, I was going to post some but thought people may take offence by them lol

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I like those, I was going to post some but thought people may take offence by them lol

Heh yea me too but I had nothing else in my mind atm

BLAOW!!!!

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I've come across some more joke and quote things I quite like

 

“I drink to make other people more interesting.”
― Ernest Hemingway

 

“Always do sober what you said you'd do drunk. That will teach you to keep your mouth shut.”
― Ernest Hemingway

 

“A lady came up to me one day and said 'Sir! You are drunk', to which I replied 'I am drunk today madam, and tomorrow I shall be sober but you will still be ugly.”
― Winston Churchill

 

“I cook with wine, sometimes I even add it to the food.”
― W.C. Fields

 

Q. Why did God invent Jameson whiskey?

A. So the Irish would never rule the world!

 

Q: What’s the difference between a G-Spot and a bottle of Jack Daniels?
A: A guy will actually SEARCH for a bottle of Jack Daniels.
 
'You lost me at "non-alcoholic"
 

'Why is it called Alcoholics Anonymous when the first thing you do is stand up and say, "My name is Tom and I'm an alcoholic?"

 

'A man walks into a bar and orders a shot of whiskey then looks into his pocket. He does this over and over again. Finally, the bartender asks why he orders a shot of whiskey and afterwards look into his pocket. The man responded, "I have a picture of my wife in there and when she starts to look good then i'll go home."

 

source: http://www.jokes4us.com/dirtyjokes/drunkjokes.html

 

If any offend then I apologise, they're only jokes :P
 

 

 

 

 

 

 


 

 


 

DESKTOP - Motherboard - Gigabyte GA-Z77X-D3H Processor - Intel Core i5-2500K @ Stock 1.135v Cooling - Cooler Master Hyper TX3 RAM - Kingston Hyper-X Fury White 4x4GB DDR3-1866 Graphics Card - MSI GeForce GTX 780 Lightning PSU - Seasonic M12II EVO Edition 850w  HDD -  WD Caviar  Blue 500GB (Boot Drive)  /  WD Scorpio Black 750GB (Games Storage) / WD Green 2TB (Main Storage) Case - Cooler Master 335U Elite OS - Microsoft Windows 7 Ultimate

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I thought I'd add some Bill Hicks since the guy cracks me up but please be aware that there is some swearing, if easily offended then please don't watch.

 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vX1CvW38cHA

 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yPl7MHThE0k

 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O5SZFOhh9fs

DESKTOP - Motherboard - Gigabyte GA-Z77X-D3H Processor - Intel Core i5-2500K @ Stock 1.135v Cooling - Cooler Master Hyper TX3 RAM - Kingston Hyper-X Fury White 4x4GB DDR3-1866 Graphics Card - MSI GeForce GTX 780 Lightning PSU - Seasonic M12II EVO Edition 850w  HDD -  WD Caviar  Blue 500GB (Boot Drive)  /  WD Scorpio Black 750GB (Games Storage) / WD Green 2TB (Main Storage) Case - Cooler Master 335U Elite OS - Microsoft Windows 7 Ultimate

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