Funny Poems!

[APrettyCoolWalrus]

Share any funny poems, phrases, or excerpts from stories here!

 

Mine are:

 

Roses are red

The Sun is gold

Get on your knees

And do as you're told

 

or a poem by David Sedaris about dogs:

http://lukadia.blogspot.com/2007/03/david-sedaris-poems-about-dogs.html

[NUFCThomas]

well it is a made up story but

[techswede]

Wear nothing, not even your bikini

I’ve spilled some gin on my weenie.

I thought this uncouth,

So I’ve added vermouth,

How’d you like me to slip you a martini?
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The grand old Duke of York

He had ten thousand men, 

And when he had the energy

He had them all again
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Spider, spider on the wall.

Ain't you got no sense at all?

Can't you see the walls been plastered?

Now you're stuck you silly bastard

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Mary had a little lamb

It ran into a pylon.

10,000 volts went up its bum

And now its wool is nylon

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1000 sticks of dynamite sitting on a wall

1000 sticks of dynamite sitting on a wall

And if one stick of dynamite should accidentally fall...

There'll be no sticks of dynamite and no effing wall