how does this sound

[MrWalex]

im applying for a part time job in a small tech place. im 16 and this would be my first job so im not rly sure what im doing . this is the email i will send to them soon. any improvements?

---------------------

Hello,

I am interested in any part time jobs you may have. I am 16 and very fascinated by technology.

I interact with computers both on a software and hardware level daily. I built my first system 3 years ago and have upgraded it ever since.

Although i have learned a lot from researching and using tech, i feel that i could develop my knowledge and skills.

Unfortunately i have very little experience in work. I am looking to improve my skills in a work place. My only previous encounter with work was on a week of work experience, where i helped around a small shop.

On this week i did small errands. However i did also take pictures and edit them into a short film for their show room.

 

I look forward to hearing back from you.

 

Name here lol

[TheGlenlivet]

Leave out the negatives (age, lack of experience etc.) and concentrate on the positives.  If you get the interview and they ask, you can discuss your age and lack of work experience.  Also run it through Word or something to check grammar and capitalization.

[just tilt]

4 minutes ago, MrWalex said:

Unfortunately i have very little experience in work... where i helped around a small shop.

On this week i did small errands. However i did also take pictures...

The i's should be capital.
Can't suggest anything about the content of the letter itself, seems fine to me. I am 15 tho lol.
Maybe you could write it from a more enthusiastic perspective, tell them how much you'd love to get the job?

[Guest]

https://www.careers.govt.nz/job-hunting/cvs-and-cover-letters/how-to-write-a-cover-letter/

 

For some tips of writing a cover letter.

 

You should write more formally as well, for instance:

 

To whom is may concern,

 

I wish to persue a casual occupation during these holidays and I have a growing intrest in computing technology. As I am 16 years of age I do not posses the required experience, nor qualifications neccessary for a job I aspire to attain in the technology sector. I wish to obtain these requirements as soon as possible and I firmly believe practical skills and experience in a work environment are neccessary. I have already taken the first steps via a prior occupation by assisting in the management of a small store (or rather name the store here). I am eager and determined to improve myself in the technology sector by expanding my skillset and experience in a similar manner. (name off place to apply) would be a great opportunity for me to persue this aspiration.

 

Yours Sincerily,

 

Name here lol

 

Remember to attach your C.V. as work experience is really good no matter how small and get references.

[TheNight]

Grammar should be perfect (Example: Capital "I"'s ). Show the company/ business that you are a mature 16 year old.

 

Also, be sure to included a CV with things such as hours you are able to work, previous work experience etc.

 

Do not include the negatives you have said. Keep it all on the positive. Make yourself look great.

 

And maybe it might be a good idea to do a personal profile, including any skills you have. 

 

I run a shop with my dad and all CV's flow through and then onto him. I always find that saying things like "Thank you for your time and I hope to hear back from you soon" tend to make me want give the person a chance.

 

Good luck. Your first job is a big deal. 

[Arika]

Do not send an email. Make a resume and covering letter and physically go to the store and hand it to the supervisor on duty or directly to the manager. I know so many places that just immediately bin emailed job applications because it shows you're not even willing to go to the store and meet the people, you're just looking for the easiest way with minimal effort. Potential employers don't like that.

[Gikero]

@Sierra Fox is correct. Whenever possible, physically give the owner/manager your cover letter and resume. Being well dressed, direct eye contact, friendly smile, no mumbling and a firm handshake will get you farther than you'd think. Doing all of these puts face to your name on the resume. After the fact, calling to inquire makes the owner/manager recall the encounter and shows you care. Even if you're young and inexperienced, a good first impression can make all the difference.

[Tsuki]

10 hours ago, RorzNZ said:

-snip-

Can you write all my coverletters? lol

[Guest]

2 hours ago, Tsuki said:

Can you write all my coverletters? lol

Don't copy and paste what I write but try and use as a base for your real letter :). Try and use formal language like I did (or tried to) and be polite. Politeness, appearance (e.g making sure u don't look casual af) and courtesy, initative go a long way. Gikero has some great advice. Some people say being a good person doesn't matter - but its especially important. No one hires a scrub.

[ShaunOfNintendo]

@Gikero I 100% second the firm handshake point. When I was going to the interview for my first full-time job, I was greeted first by my manager who gave me the most sloppy handshake I've ever experienced. Only later to be greeted by the man who was actually going to interview me who proceeded to greet me with one of the best handshakes I've ever had. I never really understood how important a good handshake was until that day.

 

The type of handshake you give to someone will leave one of the biggest first impressions to anyone you greet.

Take some time to even practice it with friends or family members.

 

Hope it works out for you man