Conspiracy Theories!

[Julian5]

So I decided to make this thread to post your concpiracy thoeries and wierd link stuff, I made this one in 30m on a recent 6950x and 5960x cpu debate thread.

Would love to hear yours too! also some (40%) of the the facts in the theory I made are true.

] Julian: I knew AMD was better, and on top of that the unclocked intel proccesors finish with a K, that siginfies kill yourself and that is a direct realtion with jacob satorius, are we missing something out here. If Im correct jacob satorius is part of intel. In his latest world hit  named "sweatshirt" he says the word morning which has 1 letter I (for intel), He says morning 3 times signifying that he means to say the letters 
 
I I I
 
3 = Triangle and Triangle = ilumate.
[30/07/2016 23:46:24] Julian: Now this does not end here, Intel released a proccesor lineup starting with J, these where released on october 4th 2013, the same day as jacob started his channel, the proccesor starts with j which has a direct relation to jacobs name and the proccesors are in end of life, all viewers of the sweatshirt music video by jacob also are in end of life due to the extreme doses of cancer given out by the video. Intel and Jacob are definately affiliated.
 

Well further investigating the subject we can see that the  6950X  is a 14nm proccesor, jacob is 14 years old and worst of all the release of the  6950X  is exactly 64 days away from jacobs birthday. taking a look at the  6950X  spec sheet we can see it is a 64 bit proccesor meaning this was all planed out, now if we look at the  5960X we can see this is a 22nm proccesor and 22 - 8 is 14 (jacobs age) and 8 - 5 is 3 (illuminati) and 5-2 is 3 and 2 is the version of the turbo boost on the  5960X. Now this is very phishy. Be sure to ask papa preast for more details
Now thats not it, remeber the 3 we pulled out of the 22nm? well coincidently the  5960X has a 3ghz boost clock and jacob satorius has 3 dogs. well after lots of research we have come to a conclusion that jacob has 2 eyes, so jacobs eyes - minus 4 (the maxiumum amount of ram channels on the  5960X) and we get 1, now concidently the  5960X can only be ran 1 cpu at a time, now if we look at the number 1 we can see that it was a slight bend at the top now looking at jacobs life we can see it is all fine until he makes a swatshirt music video which bends and tortures everyones soul. now souls are in pural and so are jacobs dogs and procesors, now looking at the 6950x we can see it does not have a soul but it has a pricetag of 1723$ and jacobs satorius swatshirt merchandise has a price tag of 2 dollars as we can see 1723 - 1 = 1721. now on the 10 september 1721 they ended the great war of the north and coincidently on the 10 september 2015 jacob satorius released his first musica.ly vine on youtube, now this is some real shit.
 
 
 
most of these facts are true. thanks wiki

 Now the HL3 release date is rumored to be on the 20th aniversary and that is the 24th of august, now we can see jacob playing counter strike in his video released august 21st of 2015, now 21+3 is 24 and 3 is illumatio but the dates match meaning jacob is ilumitated together with valve, now in that video we hear jacob say, I love you guys, and valve hates gay people so this count contradict the relation but further investigation we can see gabe newell says "I really enjoy working with him" (a gay quote) in a video by valve uploaded on the 27th of august 2015 now 27-3 is 24 so another direct relation. now 24 times 3 is 64 and the 6950x is a 64 bit processor meaning ther is another relation, 64 divided by 2 is 32 and IBM where the 2nd to devellop 32bit chips, now there is a direct relation between IBM, Valve and Jacob. Coincidently the third CEO of IBM was Jacob and worked on a satelite dvelopement project names orius. Jacob SAT (orius), now that is no pure coincidence.