DLink DIR-655 Need Help with configuring/recovery

SlayerOfHellWyrm · July 14, 2015

Long story short, my mom picked up the D-Link DIR-655 Xtreme Wireless N for $2... Tasked me with getting it up and running. Shit bricked, and I need help getting it fixed.

Symptoms:

Disc install says the router is already configd even when it's not out of the box
Disc install never detects router in stage 5/7 (new router), or 2/3 (bridged router)
Disc never detects internet connection
Backing out of disc config causes installer to crash
Web config loads maybe 10% of the time via http://192.1680.1
- This is true even when mapped statically to http://dlinkrouter via the host file
After getting the web config to launch ,it hops straight into initial startup mode
- Does not detect internet connection
- Once it's ready to save, saving causes it to display random characters on screen, and as a result, nothing is actually saved

Some other details:

Modem: Generic one that Tek Savvy provides

Router FW: 2.11NA for Rev B

Router HW: D-Link DIR 655 Rev B

Connection type: Wired via Cat5e

Internet type: 25/1 Cable

Extra:

I can tell the router firmware is updated, since the default FW shipped on the 655 is 2.00NA
I have factory reset it about 40 times...
This model does not have an emergency firmware updater
Since I can't get past config stage, I can't upload a new, or old firmware

I'm out of ideas, and ready to punt a baby... Like, I could sell this thing and let it be someone else's problem, but I'd like to sell a working piece of hardware, not a brick.

Lastly, some background.... I'm in college, finishing up my 2nd last year of Computer Systems Technology, about to head off on co-op #2 for yet another IT admin position. I have years of experience with t-shooting and such. So, if your solution consists of "Have you tried turning it off and on again", trust me, I've tried that, and you can go dig a hole just like Ubisoft.

EDIT: If you can't tell I'm frustrated, combine "ready to punt a baby" with :you can go dig a hole just like Ubisoft"