the things i have written down so far this school year

[piemadd]

• new year new me
• baboons have started to domesticate wolves is this how we die
• one of these days im gonna inject myself with pure caffeine and kill god
• if you slapped my ass with about 11,000,000 N of force, i would be able to escape earth's velocity
• i made a friend
• the friend is a lesbian. note to self: do not develop crush on, will not turn out well
• she now has a concussion lol
• to double the volume of a sound, you actually need 11x the amount of sources of that sound
• why does my alarm clock hate me
• quote of the day: "i could simulate a nuclear explosion but i would need to dissect someone's car dashboard"
• using a microwave, one could make a gun to boil their enemies to death with little effort and much portability
• oooooh another friend quote: "also im not getting enough blood flow to my brain and I cant really keep my head up for too long without passing out so can you send me the notes or lab data or whatever if im not in class"
• friend is hallucinating
• we are on a quickly spinning rock with no certain future
• juul no cool
• ok boomer
• "i couldnt sleep so i ordered my mom's birthday present, which is a customized toblerone bar that says TBBOBLERONBON"
• "my greatest secret? i don't cut my nails because im gay. i do it because it makes it easier to play minecreaft with a trackpad."
• im going to sodomize a dolphin and NOBODH CAN STOP ME
• theres nothign keeping you from taking one of the ducks from the park
• ok boomer
• i should make a cardboard cutout of mr gribble
• i should make a file encryptor but if you dont get the key correct it just gives you gay porn instead of the files
• there is nothing stopping me from getting a big pair of prop scissors and lining the fake blades with razor blades to make large, functioning, scary scissors
• i got stabbed and it didnt even fucking hurt wtf
• next time i get stabbed im going to rip the knife out and stab the fucker right back i have nothing to lose
• if you inject yourself with yeast, you can become a drunk, stumbling, alchohol creator
• theres nothing keeping me from downing an entire bottle of melatonin and never waking up again
• "OwO.....enderman-san....." (friend after seeing enderman while playing mc)
• friend is showing me trump memes that her grandpa sends her which are in her spam folder
• i have recognized the names of some of the other recipients of emails
• friend is cousin aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
• i dont need happiness, all i need is my 6 piece chicken tenders from mcdonalds reeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

[Levent]

And you couldnt even write this as a status update. 

[airdeano]

please observe our posting guidelines for the Off-Topic forums here: https://linustechtips.com/main/topic/234698-posting-guidelines-please-read/

Quote

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