How much time do you spend alone?

[DeltaE3]

Im 47, early retired so to speak and I spend probably 98% of my time alone—and honestly, that’s exactly how I like it. My lifestyle is extremely simple by choice. Most days follow the same rhythm: I wake up, have some coffee, browse the internet for a while, then clean my place top to bottom. After that, I take my dog for a walk, come home, make lunch, maybe browse a bit more or enjoy a second coffee. Then I’ll usually lift weights or do some cardio. Later in the day I might tinker with a little project, make dinner, and spend the rest of the evening watching movies or gaming.

 

I’m not wealthy by any stretch—definitely closer to broke than rich—but I do have a million-dollar view from a tiny condo and that alone gives me a sense of peace, I'm very thankful for it. I don’t go out, I don’t socialize and I’ve stopped dating altogether (for now at least). From the outside, I imagine a lot of people would see my life as a failure—or at best, a sad kind of isolation. But to me, it feels like success. I’ve actually never felt more content or fulfilled. I don’t experience loneliness. I think I’m just wired differently—solitude doesn’t bother me at all. 

 

George Carlin once said, “I’m merely an observer,” and that’s exactly how I approach life now. I see the world as a kind of theater—fascinating, absurd, and worth watching from a distance. 

 

Anyway, what sparked all this reflection today was a YouTube comment section. It was on a video about living a solitary life and hundreds of people shared stories that sounded similar to mine. I was surprised by how common this lifestyle seems to be. It made me wonder—how many of us are out here living this way and why? 

 

Anyway—if you're reading this, journal something back. Tell me a little about your own life. I’m genuinely curious. Hell, it doesn't even have to be on topic! 

[Doobeedoo]

As much as I can and I find it not enough at times heh. I always had hobbies, many that are more solo. Also good as I don't depend on others to have fun, I see many lack that and don't know what to do with themselves, that is sad. So yeah I like having my rhythm so to speak. I just like spending more time alone than with people in general. Also if we add say work which most are with people vs solo then yeah, that little free time for the most part I don't want to see or hear anyone heh. I'm not bored in life.

 

Some may see this negative, but on the other hand I wouldn't call consuming brainrot media and people in person talk about nonsense as such, clubbing and all that as having fun or having and quality time spent together. I've met and see too many people like this. Just makes me glad for hobbies I have because I'd be doomed.

Being content with myself and do what I want, if that is not understandable to some, oh man where they are in their head I wonder.

[Why_Me]

10 hours ago, DeltaE3 said:

Im 47, early retired so to speak and I spend probably 98% of my time alone—and honestly, that’s exactly how I like it. My lifestyle is extremely simple by choice. Most days follow the same rhythm: I wake up, have some coffee, browse the internet for a while, then clean my place top to bottom. After that, I take my dog for a walk, come home, make lunch, maybe browse a bit more or enjoy a second coffee. Then I’ll usually lift weights or do some cardio. Later in the day I might tinker with a little project, make dinner, and spend the rest of the evening watching movies or gaming.

 

I’m not wealthy by any stretch—definitely closer to broke than rich—but I do have a million-dollar view from a tiny condo and that alone gives me a sense of peace, I'm very thankful for it. I don’t go out, I don’t socialize and I’ve stopped dating altogether (for now at least). From the outside, I imagine a lot of people would see my life as a failure—or at best, a sad kind of isolation. But to me, it feels like success. I’ve actually never felt more content or fulfilled. I don’t experience loneliness. I think I’m just wired differently—solitude doesn’t bother me at all. 

 

George Carlin once said, “I’m merely an observer,” and that’s exactly how I approach life now. I see the world as a kind of theater—fascinating, absurd, and worth watching from a distance. 

 

Anyway, what sparked all this reflection today was a YouTube comment section. It was on a video about living a solitary life and hundreds of people shared stories that sounded similar to mine. I was surprised by how common this lifestyle seems to be. It made me wonder—how many of us are out here living this way and why? 

 

Anyway—if you're reading this, journal something back. Tell me a little about your own life. I’m genuinely curious. Hell, it doesn't even have to be on topic! 

Mt. Rainier. If I had to guess that pic was taken from Tacoma. I was raised in Enumclaw btw.

[Echothedolpin]

Your life is different from mine and that’s ok, but I would trade all the money, possessions, and beautiful views in the world and live in desperate poverty to keep my wife and kids and I would be very happy.

 

To a degree I did just that, left a career I excelled in order to pursue a family. 9 years last I have something better, but I had no hope of that for most of that last decade.

 

edit: didn’t answer the question:

 

Alone time is super valuable and rare obviously. My wife and try to communicate clearly on when we’re feeing burnt out and try to give each other a few minutes or whatever we can to have coffee out on the porch or get a quiet dinner. I do miss aspects of being able to just make a giant sandwich, pour a beer, and game for hours in a Friday night. However, it’s not the same when I’ve done it the last few years, bizarre as it sounds, I’d rather be tickling the baby and wrestling with the boys while reading them a story and eating popcorn.

[wasab]

Humans are social animals. Too much alone time can raise all sorts of health issues. You can test this out on other social animals like mice. Solidary confinement of a mouse for a couple months in a laboratory setting usually result in its death. 

 

In short, not a good idea. 

[DeltaE3]

5 hours ago, wasab said:

Humans are social animals. Too much alone time can raise all sorts of health issues. You can test this out on other social animals like mice. Solidary confinement of a mouse for a couple months in a laboratory setting usually result in its death. 

 

In short, not a good idea. 

Not a good idea for you. 

 

I don’t think most people could live the way I do—but some can and do so while staying healthy in both mind and body. As for me, I’m in better physical shape than 99% of American men. Exercise and lifting have been priorities in my life for over two decades.

 

I had a difficult childhood, with real trauma during my early years and young adulthood. I suspect that shaped a lot of who I am today. That said, I’ve got a good head on my shoulders and I’m not a bad person by any stretch. I just genuinely enjoy being alone—and for me, that’s okay.

 

The reason solitude is unhealthy for most people is because it forces you to look inward and confront deeper existential truths. For most, social interaction is a necessary distraction from that—and there’s nothing wrong with that either. But not everyone is built to sit with themselves for to long. I believe only those with real mental strength can embrace solitude without being disturbed by it.

 

Of course, I still have neighbors and interact with people briefly every day. I’m not living completely off the grid like a hermit. But even if I were, I suspect I’d still be fine.

In some ways, I think I’ve achieved something that most people never do: I’ve fully accepted who I am—and I’ve learned to genuinely like myself, flaws and all. Once you do that, it makes you almost untouchable.

[DeltaE3]

11 hours ago, Echothedolpin said:

Your life is different from mine and that’s ok, but I would trade all the money, possessions, and beautiful views in the world and live in desperate poverty to keep my wife and kids and I would be very happy.

 

To a degree I did just that, left a career I excelled in order to pursue a family. 9 years last I have something better, but I had no hope of that for most of that last decade.

 

edit: didn’t answer the question:

 

Alone time is super valuable and rare obviously. My wife and try to communicate clearly on when we’re feeing burnt out and try to give each other a few minutes or whatever we can to have coffee out on the porch or get a quiet dinner. I do miss aspects of being able to just make a giant sandwich, pour a beer, and game for hours in a Friday night. However, it’s not the same when I’ve done it the last few years, bizarre as it sounds, I’d rather be tickling the baby and wrestling with the boys while reading them a story and eating popcorn.

Thanks for sharing. I think having a family is a true blessing for most people—especially when you're good parents who put your kids first. As for me, I do enjoy being in a relationship, as long as it’s a healthy one. I’ve had long-term relationships that I really valued… until I inevitably found a way to mess things up.

 

I’ve also been in long-term relationships that were clearly unhealthy and looking back, I think—like a lot of people—I stayed in them because I was afraid of being alone. After my last relationship ended about six years ago, it was the first time I had lived alone since my early twenties. What I discovered surprised me: I actually loved it.

 

I have a great dog who’s a loyal companion and I never feel lonely or unfulfilled. These past six years have honestly been the best of my life. So right now, I’m just going with it. Will I live like this forever? Probably not—but the idea doesn’t bother me either.

[DeltaE3]

13 hours ago, Why_Me said:

Mt. Rainier. If I had to guess that pic was taken from Tacoma. I was raised in Enumclaw btw.

I like hiking Mt. Peak—actually, now that I’m thinking about it, I might head up there this weekend! Funny enough, my first serious girlfriend was from Enumclaw. I bet you probably knew her (depending on your age)—small town and all!

[Why_Me]

42 minutes ago, DeltaE3 said:

I like hiking Mt. Peak—actually, now that I’m thinking about it, I might head up there this weekend! Funny enough, my first serious girlfriend was from Enumclaw. I bet you probably knew her (depending on your age)—small town and all!

I'm old (class of '82). Enumclaw has changed a lot since I was a kid.

[Echothedolpin]

11 hours ago, DeltaE3 said:

Thanks for sharing. I think having a family is a true blessing for most people—especially when you're good parents who put your kids first. As for me, I do enjoy being in a relationship, as long as it’s a healthy one. I’ve had long-term relationships that I really valued… until I inevitably found a way to mess things up.

 

I’ve also been in long-term relationships that were clearly unhealthy and looking back, I think—like a lot of people—I stayed in them because I was afraid of being alone. After my last relationship ended about six years ago, it was the first time I had lived alone since my early twenties. What I discovered surprised me: I actually loved it.

 

I have a great dog who’s a loyal companion and I never feel lonely or unfulfilled. These past six years have honestly been the best of my life. So right now, I’m just going with it. Will I live like this forever? Probably not—but the idea doesn’t bother me either.

Unhealthy relationships are worse than being alone, I can attest to that. I spent most of my 20s without any real dating/long term relationships due to unhealthy thinking, needed counseling, growth etc. It was a huge gift because I probably would have had extremely unhealthy/codependent/you name it series of relationships that would have just slowly killed me inside. Looking back I could see glimpses of it in some of my friendships.
 

It’s tough: anyone who thinks they can have a relationship and be the same person they were before is in for a a surprise, and that’s not evening considering long term commitment and certainly not kids. I think lots of people get surprised by that and that’s a totally normal reaction to have. Shoot I struggle with it.

 

That all having been said, knowing who I was then and who I am now: I love what I have but i certainly won’t tell someone else it’s what they need to do! Everyone’s life is differently we all have similar experiences and emotions but we are all each unique.

[Dedayog]

On 7/1/2025 at 6:30 PM, DeltaE3 said:

Im 47, early retired so to speak and I spend probably 98% of my time alone—and honestly, that’s exactly how I like it. My lifestyle is extremely simple by choice. Most days follow the same rhythm: I wake up, have some coffee, browse the internet for a while, then clean my place top to bottom. After that, I take my dog for a walk, come home, make lunch, maybe browse a bit more or enjoy a second coffee. Then I’ll usually lift weights or do some cardio. Later in the day I might tinker with a little project, make dinner, and spend the rest of the evening watching movies or gaming.

 

I’m not wealthy by any stretch—definitely closer to broke than rich—but I do have a million-dollar view from a tiny condo and that alone gives me a sense of peace, I'm very thankful for it. I don’t go out, I don’t socialize and I’ve stopped dating altogether (for now at least). From the outside, I imagine a lot of people would see my life as a failure—or at best, a sad kind of isolation. But to me, it feels like success. I’ve actually never felt more content or fulfilled. I don’t experience loneliness. I think I’m just wired differently—solitude doesn’t bother me at all. 

 

George Carlin once said, “I’m merely an observer,” and that’s exactly how I approach life now. I see the world as a kind of theater—fascinating, absurd, and worth watching from a distance. 

 

Anyway, what sparked all this reflection today was a YouTube comment section. It was on a video about living a solitary life and hundreds of people shared stories that sounded similar to mine. I was surprised by how common this lifestyle seems to be. It made me wonder—how many of us are out here living this way and why? 

 

Anyway—if you're reading this, journal something back. Tell me a little about your own life. I’m genuinely curious. Hell, it doesn't even have to be on topic! 

I am taking the view that since you've posted here about being alone, you're actually NOT okay with being alone as much as you say.

 

You want to reach out and connect with people, interact on some level (be it a forum or whatever), but you're definitely looking for something.

 

That said, long as your happy.. .awesome!  Enjoy that view!

[DeltaE3]

On 7/3/2025 at 5:40 AM, Dedayog said:

I am taking the view that since you've posted here about being alone, you're actually NOT okay with being alone as much as you say.

 

You want to reach out and connect with people, interact on some level (be it a forum or whatever), but you're definitely looking for something.

 

That said, long as your happy.. .awesome!  Enjoy that view!

That’s a pretty silly take. When did I say I don’t want to talk to people? I actually enjoy making posts like this—I find it interesting to see how others respond, and I like hearing about people’s lives. You’re right about one thing though: I am looking for something—entertainment. Same reason you read the post and replied.... No hidden meaning! 

[SpaceGhostC2C]

Definitely not enough!  

 

What I find difficult in your daily routine is that it doesn't include any kind of work. You say you are closer to "broke", but for most people your age, work is unavoidable, and that comes with some degree of additional human interaction (how much depends on the type of work - but even a hermit self-employed person has to deal with customers from time to time).

 

That was basically my life 10-15 years ago (remove the dog, add a job, and in the later years a long-distance relationship with whom would later become my wife) and I can absolutely see why you love it. Now, comparing with other people, I also see how it's up to your personality type, some people really get depressed quickly on their own. Same way I value nothing more than free time, while I know many others who almost fear retirement or even long holidays. The "what am I going to do all day?" types.

 

Looking back to those years, I can say I'm not one to dislike interaction with others in general; in fact, I value certain interactions a lot - but they involve a very narrow and selective group of people, and definitely hate crowds. However, I know people who are the opposite, who value quantity over quality of connections, feel energized by crowded places, etc.

 

[MC.Morrado]

I'm used to being alone. 20, never been in a relationship, autistic... And it's hard to get a job because of the economy and most job listings being fake.

 

I don't use social media or own a smartphone (by choice) simply because I never cared about some stupid online drama or passing trend. I use the internet to be anti-social, god dammit! And if I want to play weird custom campaigns in Left 4 Dead 2, I damn well will.

 

Not much to say about me other than I can go for days without talking to another human being and nothing would change about my routine.

[YellowJersey]

99.9999% of the human race is garbage, I'd rather be alone at this point. Fuck I hate people.

[Dedayog]

1 hour ago, YellowJersey said:

99.9999% of the human race is garbage, I'd rather be alone at this point. Fuck I hate people.

Or hang out on forums with said 99.9999%

 

Good to have ya!

[jmwhite33]

Hmmmm, I never thought that a question such as "how much time do you spend alone?" could have a solution.

learn sumtin' new everyday I guess.