My Parents Don't Like Gaming

[otherworldlynob]

3 hours ago, SpookyCitrus said:

Honestly until you turn 16, 17, or even 18 years old and they start letting you make decisions for yourself or when you're legally an adult, there's not really much you can do. They more than likely want you to focus on school, only reason I can think of for any parent buying a nice 8th gen i7 laptop for schoolwork for a less than 16 year old. I didn't really have a problem with my parents limiting what I could buy or do, basically if I worked hard and earned the money myself I could really buy anything I wanted, within reason for my age of course. Some parents aren't like that, especially ones that have never played a video game in their life and just see it as a waste of time, or buy into the media spiel about it being a bad influence. But until you have some sort of free range or you're old enough to move out, your parents are still going to have the say in everything you do or buy especially if you're still as young as I've gathered from the post. Gaming computers are expensive, a better bet for you would be to go for a console, they're selling for pretty cheap on Facebook Marketplace an you can also check in your local classifieds. If it's cheap and can be regulated by your parents with time limits and other factors then they may be more keen to the idea of letting you start playing video games. Since they really wont even let you buy computer parts like ram because they think it's for gaming it may just not be the right time, wait a few more months or years depending on your age and try again, wait for a birthday or Christmas and ask for one then. Sometimes there are things you want to do or buy when you're young that your parents just can't get you whether they want to and can't afford it or don't want to and can, in those instances it's something you put on the back burner until you can get it for yourself or they have some sort of change in either their finances or their mindset.

I would go for a console but my parents don't want me spending money on gaming. As for the rest, thanks for understanding. Finances is not an issue, its the mindset that is the issue here.

[otherworldlynob]

4 minutes ago, dalekphalm said:

*Shrugs*

 

If your parents won't listen, and your dad called your essay dumb, I guess you're kind of screwed.

 

I gave you some advice - try to think about it, take a step back, and try a different tactic. If that's insufficient, or that doesn't work, you'll either have to try something else or accept the situation as-is.

Yeah, thanks for being helpful, though.

[GDRRiley]

1 hour ago, otherworldlynob said:

Same thing, basically anything I want related for computers falls under gaming to them.

I'd push for the ram, something about chrome being a ram hog

[mr moose]

You are looking for a solution to an environmental problem.  People are stubborn by nature (all people), and the one inescapable fact of life is that when you are young you are not considered to be experienced enough know what is good for you, the biggest trap younger generations fall into is demanding and making the "it's not fair" argument.  These two things only compound the problem and never fix anything.    It doesn't matter what you think, the issue is what your parents think and why.   

 

As you grow you will be able to start to apply some leverage, but you have to be smart about it,  many people respond to maturity long before they respond intellectual arguments.    5 pages essays say you are trying to convince them they are wrong rather than show them you are deserving.   It is likely your father didn't even read it, after all his job is to raise you, not be taught by you.   I know some of this makes life hard and futile for now, but the reality is that all life is hard and futile, it does not change as you grow, you simply trade off some oppression for other forms of oppression.   What is important is how you approach it and that in turn determines how soon you get what you want.

[Tieox]

On 2/16/2020 at 9:16 PM, otherworldlynob said:

I'm looking for some advice.

 

So I can't actually game because I have a trash laptop. I'm currently a minor and can't get a job, meaning I have to depend on my parents to do that for me. The issue is, my parents don't like gaming. No, money is not a problem, I have some saved up, although not really enough for a decent system. Now even if I do a lemonade stand or whatever like you guys will say, they won't actually let me use my money to buy stuff for gaming. No, I can't buy a console, either. I don't have any way to buy stuff online either. 

I wrote my dad a 5 page essay about why he should get me a gaming PC and how everything like that works. https://docs.google.com/document/d/1A3QxJtm9LUl2TxslCc0Peaw8s-br7W2-Jk8c4aq1-Ew/edit?usp=sharing
I waited to give it to him. At one point he asked me, "Why don't you make money by doing videos like those people?" I'm like, ah, excellent opportunity, and I brandish my 5 page essay after saying "Let me explain why."

Well, he reads for twenty seconds and then stops and announces it's just an excuse for gaming. Wonderful.

 

I really have no idea what to do now. I mean, no, I can't buy anything with money I make because they wouldn't let me, so please don't say that like everyone else I've asked. 
What do you guys think I should you? This really means a lot to me. Anyway, as I stated in the essay, this would also allow me to do programming and stuff. My current specs:
i7-8550U @ 2GHz
Intel UHD Graphics 620
8GB DDR4-2666MHz RAM
This is all packed in my epic trash HP laptop which I place on the arm of a couch and keep my generic Logitech wireless mouse on the arm of the sofa next to it.

Thanks!

I'd aim for graphics design, and Final Cut work, and try and get a decent AMD GPU powered Mac. Then bootcamp it and run games when they ain't around.

[FakeCIA]

4 minutes ago, Kierax said:

I'd aim for graphics design, and Final Cut work, and try and get a decent AMD GPU powered Mac. Then bootcamp it and run games when they ain't around.

While I am not a fan of Apple products, you could turn that into a sleeper since it doesn't have the gamer design. Just make sure you have a good antivirus though. Macs are more susceptible to attacks nowadays.

[Tieox]

Get an older Apple Mac Pro 

 

 

All for your interest in video editing talking about hardware news, and graphic design but the potential to be a decent sleeper for some games.

[GDRRiley]

14 minutes ago, Kierax said:

Get an older Apple Mac Pro 

 

 

All for your interest in video editing talking about hardware news, and graphic design but the potential to be a decent sleeper for some games.

a used vega 7 with dual 6 cores 64gb of ram and 4HDD+PCIE ssds. those are some great machines

[otherworldlynob]

58 minutes ago, GDRRiley said:

I'd push for the ram, something about chrome being a ram hog

May try it out, lol, although dad'll probably think it's just for gaming

[otherworldlynob]

40 minutes ago, mr moose said:

You are looking for a solution to an environmental problem.  People are stubborn by nature (all people), and the one inescapable fact of life is that when you are young you are not considered to be experienced enough know what is good for you, the biggest trap younger generations fall into is demanding and making the "it's not fair" argument.  These two things only compound the problem and never fix anything.    It doesn't matter what you think, the issue is what your parents think and why.   

 

As you grow you will be able to start to apply some leverage, but you have to be smart about it,  many people respond to maturity long before they respond intellectual arguments.    5 pages essays say you are trying to convince them they are wrong rather than show them you are deserving.   It is likely your father didn't even read it, after all his job is to raise you, not be taught by you.   I know some of this makes life hard and futile for now, but the reality is that all life is hard and futile, it does not change as you grow, you simply trade off some oppression for other forms of oppression.   What is important is how you approach it and that in turn determines how soon you get what you want.

Hmm, interesting. I guess I'm kind of stuck for now.

[otherworldlynob]

33 minutes ago, Kierax said:

I'd aim for graphics design, and Final Cut work, and try and get a decent AMD GPU powered Mac. Then bootcamp it and run games when they ain't around.

idk tbh, I might look at it but I'm not into some roundabout way for this, sure I have some interest in graphic design but not too much. Might work though.

[mr moose]

26 minutes ago, otherworldlynob said:

Hmm, interesting. I guess I'm kind of stuck for now.

No, Don't ever consider yourself stuck, when you do that you mentally position yourself as being in a helpless place.  There is always something to work with, it just won't produce a result in the immediate future (instant gratification is the enemy),  you just need to be careful and use the time you have now to better understand your parents and what makes them the way they are.  Someone very intelligent once told me, we always have something to learn from the people we argue with.  Even if it seems minor,  everyone know something worth knowing.

[otherworldlynob]

44 minutes ago, mr moose said:

No, Don't ever consider yourself stuck, when you do that you mentally position yourself as being in a helpless place.  There is always something to work with, it just won't produce a result in the immediate future (instant gratification is the enemy),  you just need to be careful and use the time you have now to better understand your parents and what makes them the way they are.  Someone very intelligent once told me, we always have something to learn from the people we argue with.  Even if it seems minor,  everyone know something worth knowing.

Eh, I feel like half the people I've talked to are trying to convince me otherwise. I myself won't actually give up hope though, there are alternatives here. 

[Guest]

Well, play cards more often. 

Bluffing, full house, sitting on triple Aces.

 

Pick a hobby that would be ultimately more expensive. Try to show a passion of interest. Make sure it consumes parents time a lot. 

Once they start figuring out costs, loss of their time...... maybe the gaming PC idea wouldn't be so bad lol.

 

Or pick something else to do instead of Gaming. 

 

I was starting fires and shooting small game at your age. lol.

 

 

[otherworldlynob]

3 minutes ago, ShrimpBrime said:

Well, play cards more often. 

Bluffing, full house, sitting on triple Aces.

 

Pick a hobby that would be ultimately more expensive. Try to show a passion of interest. Make sure it consumes parents time a lot. 

Once they start figuring out costs, loss of their time...... maybe the gaming PC idea wouldn't be so bad lol.

 

Or pick something else to do instead of Gaming. 

 

I was starting fires and shooting small game at your age. lol.

 

 

Yeah, my mom barely trusts me with a butter knife lol

[Guest]

1 minute ago, otherworldlynob said:

Yeah, my mom barely trusts me with a butter knife lol

It sounds like you're an only child. Do you have brother or sisters?

[otherworldlynob]

Just now, ShrimpBrime said:

It sounds like you're an only child. Do you have brother or sisters?

Yeah, younger sister 3.5 years younger

[Guest]

Well, sounds like getting gaming for you is next to impossible. 

 

I thought it was pretty neat that you made that letter. Not a bad idea to educate them, but if they aren't willing to learn, then you're at a loss. That's what they fear for you. Parents job, make kids succeed. All costs. Even children unhappy.

 

My approach with my kids, all 5 years apart is quite simple. Positive reinforcement. 

They are allowed to game, that's not an issue. They loose the privilege if the grades are no good. 

My 13 year old daughter has a 4.1 GPA. She's free to do as she pleases. Gonna succeed that one will for sure.

Got my oldest in college already. Time flies. Youngest still in grade school. He's doing very well in class, also rewarded.

 

They do something wrong, which is seldom, they don't get treated like animals. I talk with them to be sure they understand what's what. We go about our business. I do not generally take things away from them. It generates hatred. Not a good approach.

 

Had an issue with my youngest. last year hitting people. I cured this with only talk and at home wrestling. It helps him release aggravation and energy. No need to take games away from him, that never works. 

 

Parenting ain't easy, they are just doing what they think is best.

[greenmax]

25 minutes ago, otherworldlynob said:

Yeah, my mom barely trusts me with a butter knife lol

Over protective parents can be very harmful for children. It can get to extremes.

[otherworldlynob]

16 minutes ago, ShrimpBrime said:

Well, sounds like getting gaming for you is next to impossible. 

 

I thought it was pretty neat that you made that letter. Not a bad idea to educate them, but if they aren't willing to learn, then you're at a loss. That's what they fear for you. Parents job, make kids succeed. All costs. Even children unhappy.

 

My approach with my kids, all 5 years apart is quite simple. Positive reinforcement. 

They are allowed to game, that's not an issue. They loose the privilege if the grades are no good. 

My 13 year old daughter has a 4.1 GPA. She's free to do as she pleases. Gonna succeed that one will for sure.

Got my oldest in college already. Time flies. Youngest still in grade school. He's doing very well in class, also rewarded.

 

They do something wrong, which is seldom, they don't get treated like animals. I talk with them to be sure they understand what's what. We go about our business. I do not generally take things away from them. It generates hatred. Not a good approach.

 

Had an issue with my youngest. last year hitting people. I cured this with only talk and at home wrestling. It helps him release aggravation and energy. No need to take games away from him, that never works. 

 

Parenting ain't easy, they are just doing what they think is best.

I have great grades, that's not the issue for them

[otherworldlynob]

3 minutes ago, greenmax said:

Over protective parents can be very harmful for children. It can get to extremes.

Not extremes, but yeah my friend like walks through the forest to my house and my mom doesn't even let me out of the neighborhood on my own or up the freaking back yard hill (back yard hills are not very steep)

[greenmax]

4 minutes ago, otherworldlynob said:

Not extremes, but yeah my friend like walks through the forest to my house and my mom doesn't even let me out of the neighborhood on my own or up the freaking back yard hill (back yard hills are not very steep)

Yeah that means they are co-dependent and enablers, very unhealthy but what can a child do, not much if anything.

 

Therapy helps

Counselling helps

[otherworldlynob]

22 hours ago, ShrimpBrime said:

Well, sounds like getting gaming for you is next to impossible. 

 

I thought it was pretty neat that you made that letter. Not a bad idea to educate them, but if they aren't willing to learn, then you're at a loss. That's what they fear for you. Parents job, make kids succeed. All costs. Even children unhappy.

 

My approach with my kids, all 5 years apart is quite simple. Positive reinforcement. 

They are allowed to game, that's not an issue. They loose the privilege if the grades are no good. 

My 13 year old daughter has a 4.1 GPA. She's free to do as she pleases. Gonna succeed that one will for sure.

Got my oldest in college already. Time flies. Youngest still in grade school. He's doing very well in class, also rewarded.

 

They do something wrong, which is seldom, they don't get treated like animals. I talk with them to be sure they understand what's what. We go about our business. I do not generally take things away from them. It generates hatred. Not a good approach.

 

Had an issue with my youngest. last year hitting people. I cured this with only talk and at home wrestling. It helps him release aggravation and energy. No need to take games away from him, that never works. 

 

Parenting ain't easy, they are just doing what they think is best.

All of you guys, I'm wondering if each of you could possibly write a quote which I could collect to base my explanations on. Preferably make them addressed as if you were talking to my dad himself and convincing him. Thank you.

[otherworldlynob]

On 2/16/2020 at 4:30 PM, ShrimpBrime said:

Took wrong approach. Blew your cover early.

It was supposed to be a build for schooling and education. 

Can't change a parents mind, you gotta go with what they Will agree with.

 

Try again, leave out all the fancy LED stuff, it's for school. Not gaming. Gotta have the looks of an office PC to pull it off

 

Good Luck

 

 

 

All of you guys, I'm wondering if each of you could possibly write a quote which I could collect to base my explanations on. Preferably make them addressed as if you were talking to my dad himself and convincing him. Thank you.

[otherworldlynob]

On 2/17/2020 at 3:24 AM, GreatnessRD said:

Have you asked your parents why they won't allow you to game? Have you tried to talk to them and say...

 

 "Hey, I'm doing well in school and do my chores. I'd like to upgrade my computer so I can do some recreational things like graphic design and casual gaming when you guys allow me an hour or two."

 

Like the others said, you gotta finesse it a bit. If that doesn't work, then you'll have to wait till you're older. Just keep being respectful with your inquiry when you ask them.

All of you guys, I'm wondering if each of you could possibly write a quote which I could collect to base my explanations on. Preferably make them addressed as if you were talking to my dad himself and convincing him. Thank you.