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So much for Fedora then. Can't even install it under virtualbox because the installer freezes on the language selection screen. Nothing wrong with the .iso either, checksums match. Complete and utter garbage.
Debian and Mint run just fine, as do all my Windows VMs. I'm only having this issue with Fedora.
Oh well, I have a spare 120GB SSD so I can give it a go on bare metal on my other PC. It's not like it can screw up anything if I can't even get the installer to work. At worst I lose some write endurance on an old USB stick. I just hate wasting my time on these kinds of issues.