Cree340

A friend of mine bought a "gaming" PC for $1000. He knows nothing about PC. 4 GB of RAM, 1 TB of HDD, no ssd, GTX 650, intel pentium dual core e2160... $1000 tho. What a crap system

it was like a chinese brand 720p monitor. never told him how much he could get with $1000 since it would break his heart.

something made specifically to do that immediately would be called an electronic typewriter...

Well, technically that what you type on your keyboard (input) CAN come out of your printer (output)

I learned my father how to take screen shots. Later he come to me with opened screen shot of a web page and he said "It doesn't want to scroll down".

A guy i know said he had a new gaming PC so I asked him what graphics card he had. He said: "I have a Radeon GTX 970X with an AMD 4790K."

Guy at my school decides to claim that a console is more powerful than a PC. NOT IN MY HOUSE. after the classical back and forth like you might imagine, I pull the victorious argument by refrencing the video when linus underclocked a five-year-old graphics card to get console performance. Flustered, he yells, "well then he needs to get a better T.V.!" not speaking with him for a while... the stupid is too much.

There's this person at my school, that no matter how many times I've convinced him otherwise thinks that a computer is a tower and a laptop is not a computer. So whenever I say "so your computer..." he says, "I don't have a computer" and then I reply with, but don't you have your acer laptop and then he says, "Its a laptop not a computer"

There's this person at my school, that no matter how many times I've convinced him otherwise thinks that a computer is a tower and a laptop is not a computer. So whenever I say "so your computer..." he says, "I don't have a computer" and then I reply with, but don't you have your acer laptop and then he says, "Its a laptop not a computer"

I know, its so annoying, the more you tell them to stop the more they do it. I bring a cloth wherever I go now because of it. And of course there's people that eat over their keyboards, it makes me cringe especially because you see their keyboards and its like full of crumbs and stuff and you'd wonder if their computer would overheat from the crumbs stuck in the heatsink.

There's this person at my school, that no matter how many times I've convinced him otherwise thinks that a computer is a tower and a laptop is not a computer. So whenever I say "so your computer..." he says, "I don't have a computer" and then I reply with, but don't you have your acer laptop and then he says, "Its a laptop not a computer"

There's this person at my school, that no matter how many times I've convinced him otherwise thinks that a computer is a tower and a laptop is not a computer. So whenever I say "so your computer..." he says, "I don't have a computer" and then I reply with, but don't you have your acer laptop and then he says, "Its a laptop not a computer"

There's this person at my school, that no matter how many times I've convinced him otherwise thinks that a computer is a tower and a laptop is not a computer. So whenever I say "so your computer..." he says, "I don't have a computer" and then I reply with, but don't you have your acer laptop and then he says, "Its a laptop not a computer"

There's this person at my school, that no matter how many times I've convinced him otherwise thinks that a computer is a tower and a laptop is not a computer. So whenever I say "so your computer..." he says, "I don't have a computer" and then I reply with, but don't you have your acer laptop and then he says, "Its a laptop not a computer"

I know people that have a password or PIN to protect their mobile device, which they usually ask me to do for them, and then write the code inside the sleeve or case for when they forget it.
 
Other people insist that their PC is slow because they have a lot of photos or MP3s on their hard drive. When you go and look for it, they usually have under 10 gigs of files, but the PC is just like 10 years old. If you tell them that's the reason that it's slow, they will reply with "but it's a pentium!".

Multi-card configs run at 8X each per card, if the CPU has 16 lanes. According to Linus' PCI-E lanes video, lanes don't really matter, it's only a 1 FPS difference
I'm going to need you to ask her to play with one of those shape matching toys, where you put the correct shaped shape into the correct shaped hole. Otherwise, you need to send her back to Kindergarten

Maybe its just me, but I find it hilarious to play around with my mom pretending I'm an elite hacker. So, using the Chrome, Show Clip Inspector feature, I edited the text on my grades. On my grades their is a big header at the top saying "Welcome _____________" I would change my name to someone in my grade and claim I had hacked into their grade book. Wanting to go bigger, though, I went to the Apple website and started changing the text to things like "Apple sucks", "Don't Buy Apple!". At this point my mom started freaking out. Her reaction of "I'm telling your father" was priceless.

Sorry if this is a bit off-topic but I found this hilarious website called hollywood technical jargon generator.
 
http://shinytoylabs.com/jargon/
 
Best ones:
 
"If we index the array, we can get to the PCI bus through the redundant SMS sensor!"
 
"The CSS panel is down, override the 1080p system so we can program the SMS microchip!"
 
"Try to back up the ADP panel, maybe it will copy the 1080p driver!"
 
 

I have successfully convinced all of the people at my lunch table (8 including me) in school that PC is the most powerful gaming platform. Even though 5/8 of them play on consoles, they still acknowledge the fact that PC is the dominant gaming platform and will continue to be in the future. They don't play on PC simply because they are unable to afford it (building/buying a gaming PC). I have not told them about the magniflorious magic of building their own PC yet, I will let them find that out for themselves. Thank you all, have a good day.

My sister thought micro computers were made by microsoft...

Didn't know this thread was a thing but here is what happened to me earlier
 
So earlier my brother asked me to install the Microsoft office suite on his laptop.. I went ahead and did it and then he asked if I could install google docs....
yea... you read that right... then I explained the concept of google to him and now he knows.....
 
Yea.....
/facepalm 

It needed to be formally mentioned here:
My sister recently spent 3 hours "trying to install Minecraft" on both of her sons laptops.
 
How exactly one manage to take so long doing that I still do not know.

Family and I walk into restaurant with unusually large TVs. Bro says, "I bet they use DirecTV". When I asked why, he said "because DirecTV usually has big screens".

I was having a skype chat with my friend yesterday and he asked me how much ram my setup had, I just told him I had 16gb and that it was fine, and he said "aha, I have yet to find someone with more ram than me" So I proceeded to ask him and he said he had 64gb on his laptop, he said he and his dad built his laptop, and he said that his dad "works for this kinda shit, trust me".
 
I then asked him to list his specs, to which he hastily started blurting out "uh, killer e2200, uhhhh sound blaster, uhhhhh GTX 850, 1tb ssd with a 1tb hdd and some cooler boost button", I assumed that he used an msi barebones laptop case to which he nervously replied "yea".
 
So I asked him what cpu he had, to which he replied after a few seconds, "uhhh 17 (seventeen, seven fucking teen), no wait, i7", he then laughed it off (I presume he was just reading the stuff off the stickers on his laptop). He also stated that "I soldered shit together when i built the laptop with my dad". After I asked him to send a screenshot of his specs on cpu-z and gpu-z etc, he said "ey man don't distract me, im watchin ze youtubes, ill do it later". I haven't gotten a response after an entire day.
 
The smell of bullshit was so strong, I could feel it in my lungs. Seriously though, who pairs a 1tb ssd with a gtx 850 and 64 fucking gigabytes of ram (do laptop ram sticks even go up to that capacity without costing like $1000)? He said he doesn't do any content creation, only steam games, so this made no sense whatsoever.
 
I don't mind educating people who genuinely want to know more about computers, but self entitled assholes who believe that they know everything and have wads of cash to spend on the most unnecessary shit are the real scum of the earth.
 
I'm sure no one will see this at almost 800 pages, but if you're on a marathon streak like I am, I congratulate you for getting this far