Cree340

She browses Linus Style!

even if she can power it on she will likely check internet explorer

We were recently doing some online testing at school. ON CHROMEBOOKS! *vomits* (That's Besides the Point Though). Midway through the testing everything goes wrong. Everybody starts getting kicked from test. My knowledge in basic IT infrastructure and ABILITY TO READ OBVIOUS CHROME ERROR MESSAGES, led me to believe the server the test was running on had crashed, and the testing software was kicking everybody when it couldn't auto-save. So the teacher tells everybody to reboot their Chromebooks. Knowing that the issue is not on our end, I calmly try to explain that it will not help anything. This was useless until the tech person came in and fixed the issue. Yeah for not listening to the nerd!

Got a question you think lots of people have asked before? Then this topic is for you! (Most likely not final version, any suggestions for improvements are very welcomed).
Things to do (feel free to leave suggestions):
Edit the order from most common to least common question.
Suggest some good routers in different price brackets.
Suggest some VPN providers.
Maybe add more questions.
General polishing.
 
 
 
Why is my Internet so slow?
 
How can I improve my wireless speed?
Quick list of things you can do to improve your wireless speeds:
 
What do the different wireless standards (802.11n, 802.11ac, etc) mean?
 
2.4GHz vs. 5GHz and what does dual band mean?
What is QoS?
What is the difference between a router, a switch and a modem?
 
What should I look for when buying a router?
 
What is port forwarding and how do I do it?
 
 
How do I access my router's web interface?
 
What is the difference between Megabit and Megabyte?
 
I have heard about this thing called pfSense, what is it?
 
What is a VPN and do I need one?
 

I'd also add a quick section on IPv4 subnets, and what the difference is between a Class A, Class B, and Class C subnet.
 
Class A example: 10.0.0.0/12 - Supports up to 16,777,616 IP addresses - 2^24 - Subnet Mask: 255.0.0.0
Class B example: 172.10.0.1/16 - Supports up to 65,534 IP addresses - 2^16 - Subnet Mask: 255.255.0.0
Class C example: 192.168.0.1/24 - Supports up to 254 IP addresses - 2^8 - Subnet Mask: 255.255.255.0
 
To calculate the amount of IP's in a  subnet, use the power of 2^bits in an octet. There are 8 bits in an octet (X.X.X.X).
 
.0 is your netmask, .1 is usually your gateway, and .255 is usually your broadcast.

So I got one friend that's actually called kevin. (The american jeff)
I built myself a nice pc for gaming, and he was so fascinated when I showed him graphics from awesome games and when I showed him what 144hz actually look like.
So he asked me what my pc costed and where I got it from.
I told him that I built it myself and that it was around 1300€.
He said (translated to english) "Whoa dude that's damn expensive, why does it cost that much?"
So we talked and talked very long and he did simply not understand why it costed that much. He always was a guy who claimed he is good at computers, but doesn't know sh*t. Like, really nothing, he didn't know how to open a program 1 year ago.
So, as I alteady mentioned, he wanted a pc like mine.
(I got myself a nice BitFenix Shinobi case and a nice gtx 970 OC'd with a good xeon processor)
He went to Hofer (the austrian "wallmart", only worse than walmart..) and looked for a "play pc".
One guy working there showed him many different pcs and always said (Translated to english) "That's the best one we have." Or "This one is a gaming monster!" So finally he found a pc that looked like my Shinobi, and immediately thought that it had to be good.
The guy, kevin is a guy that always claims that he is right and everybody else is talking bullshit. So he bought the pc for 200€. (!!?)
He came to my house a day after that and told me he bought a gaming pc, and I asked him "Yeah, hey that's amazing! What did you get?" We went to his house and he showed my his pc and said "You f*cking idiot bought a pc for 1300€ haha i got it for 200€ noob" and things like that, I wanted to laugh really really hard but I had to troll him a little bit. He still is so stupid today and still think's that everyone else is an idiot. Anyways, I told him that he should get GTA 4 and install ICEnhancer and an ENB (ultimate graphics mods) (like I showed him at my house) and he actually bought the game and was all happy about it and talked to me in Teamspeak, and said things like "You idiot don't know anything about pc's get fooled by companies.. 1300€! Haha idiot" the whole night
Then when his game downloaded I sent him the graphics mods and showed him how to install them.
I had to go to his house again because he doesn't know how to open a ZIP file or even locate to his steam folder.
So I had to launch the game at first, and I already knew what's inside the pc, so I'm going to tell you now: It was an AMD Athlon 64 X2 4200+ and a 15€ graphics card - Doesn't exist today anymore. As I started the game so it created the first folder and things so I can install the graphics mod afterwards, he pushed me away from his desk - And he somewhat wanted to start a little kid fight - But he sat down and chilled.
So he went to his computer and waited for his game to load it was an around 7 MB/s HDD and 4GB 800mhz ram I think.. The game actually did load, I was surprised, so every setting was set to ultra low and 800x600 screen resolution.
He got about 3 fps for like half a minute until the game crashed. He asked me why it did crash and called me an idiot for pc gaming and he actually called me an idiot for fooling him...
He does have 2 virusses on the computer since it was factory new by the way..
The next days he tells his friends that he built himself a gaming pc and said things like "with a percessor" (<-- That's actually the word he said..) and showed the a picture of his case.
He told them about games he played and said things like GTA 5 (it wasn't out yet) and he is a game developer. Some of my friends actually believed this. The rest also trolled them.
2 days ago I actually don't meet them anymore because I don't want idiots as friends.
Thanks for reading

didnt know where to put this, thought it was brilluiant. 

I couldn't imagine life without wifi...
I sound like a white girl now lol

I believe that age and maturity are two very different things that should always be considered independent of each other.

My friend who calls himself a techie does the following:
Thinks ram is used as storage before the hdd accesses it..
Thinks the razer blade is blah because he mindlessly hates on razer just because Linus once ranted about the new peripherals.
Thinks his cpu isn't overheating when it's running @ 73C.. In the bios...
Also used vassaline as thermal compound. P

even google is a grammarnazi

 
meanwhile

Mind you this is in prime time:
 
Edit: new test outside of prime time:
 

 
 
Edit: Got a slight upgrade, prime time speed again:
 

Person 1: Windows and android are both operating systems right?
 
Me: Yeh, why?
 
*Person 1 gets Person 2*
 
Person 2: I know android and apple are operating systems but windows isn't.
 
*I facepalm*

My friends computers RAM was broken. I told him to get new one. He asked where he could DOWNLOAD new RAM... XDD

So I finally received a much better wireless adapter than I had before which I ordered a few days ago. After telling my stepdad about how I was getting 45 mbps download when I was getting 5 mbps before, his response was:
"Oh, so you're hogging the internet from us? I don't really like that. How would you feel if I ordered a PCI Wiffee thing to make my laptop faster that slowed you down?"
 
 
 
 
                                                      -______________________________________________________-

This is my family's network. With my aunt and uncle on my dad's side being neighbors and having a family with networking and computer background comes a pretty spectacular network.
 
Colors:
Purple: PoE
Red: Main Internet Connections from ISP
Grey: Got too lazy to continue, but basically consists of:
vlans
cable connections
fiber/ethernet connections
 
I'm not sure of the specific model numbers, but I do know the switches are Juniper and Cisco.
There maybe a few errors in the diagram, because I didn't setup the entire network so I'm not entirely sure about it all just an overview from my dad and uncle. Under all three roofs there's a combined 19 people and almost all of us use the internet on a daily basis so you could imagine how much data we pull through a month heck even annually.
 
Having fiber runs to each house was necessary, because of the cable runs and latency. Also, we have Remote Site VPNs in-place that connect to a datacenter in Dallas that hosts a couple of our site-to-site VPN servers. This is, because the datacenter has "optimized routing" or BGPs coupled with multiple fiber lines to many tier 1 and 2 carriers. Basically what happens here is our network traffic goes through the VPN servers located at the datacenter and from there they take the most optimal route to it's destination. I'm very lucky to have a family and network like this. I just wish my dad would let me in the networking room, but hey at least I get to mess with the ESXi servers and host various services.
 
EDIT #1: We do have a load balancer for both the GigaPower connections.
 

As promised: 
 

 
 

 
 
Networks:
LAN: 172.18.0.0/15 SAN: 10.10.10.0/24  VLAN 10 VOIP: 10.90.1.0/24  
Gateway:
Ubiquity EdgeRouter ER-8 Pro  
Switches:
Arista 7124SX 24 port 10Gbe SFP+ switch Quanta LB4M 48 port 1Gbe 8P8C & 2 port 10Gbe SFP+ switch HP 1810-8Gv2 2x Netgear GS105Tv2 AP's:
2x Ubiquiti UniFi AP Ubiquiti UniFi outdoor with AMO-2G13 antenna (1.4 meter tall antenna)

So about a year ago, I was on a school excursion, and as I sat on the school bus I got out my Nexus 7. One of the teachers, sitting across the bus from me (who is the most tech illiterate person I've ever met) looked at my tablet. He smirked and said:
 
Him: That's not an iPad
Me: Nope
Him: It's a Samsung, isn't it?
Me:... It's an Android tablet
Him: A what?
Me:...... An Android tablet
Him: What's that?
I ignored him for the rest of the trip.
 
ALSO
 
This teacher used to have an iPhone 5 in a LifeProof case. But he only had a film screen protector on the phone. One day he dropped it face down on a gravel path, and was really mad at Lifeproof that his precious iPhone's screen was now cracked. He then ranted about sueing Lifeproof. I walked away.

There's this person I know, he asked me what computer I use. I replied, "I built it." He then said, "Then it must be slow and crappy."

Every time I have to explain HDD vs SSD to non-techies I take a deep breath and start with "A hard drive is like a stack of CDs ..."

One of my aunt was a real estate agent (now retired) and was using a software that "need an internet connection", so eveytime she would need to use that real estate software she would open an IE window, wait for it to load and then minimize it, she would then open the real estate software (she literally thought that an internet connection meant having IE open lollll)
 
EDIT : fixed typos ...

Some non-techie who bought a laptop that I prepared for selling was complaining that the laptop was useless since it didn't have "Microsoap"...
 
I had my contact explain that it's "Microsoft" and it's a brand that covers lots of stuff and that he should buy the software that he needs... be it Windows, Office, Security Essentials, etc...
 
The machine was sold with a fresh re-image of the Win7 install that it came with...

Is this guy retarded?

From my experience when a non techie person has a computer problem related to the power supply (like if their computer wasn't turning on), they always assume that some sort of "battery" inside the tower has run out of charge. And btw this is almost for every non techie person I meet with a power issue. 

People actually do this: